


This Is How We'll Dance

by Loveless_Angel (orphan_account)



Category: Bleach
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-03
Updated: 2012-07-03
Packaged: 2017-11-09 03:13:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 29,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/450628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Loveless_Angel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ichigo made a horrible decision involving a demon named Shiro. Now fleeing from the law with his life, he seeks help from his Kisuke Urahara, who introduces a certain blue-haired man as his reluctant bodyguard. But Shiro has other plans.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Just A Taste Of What You Paid For

**Author's Note:**

> My apologies if the format is all screwed up. Something weird happened when I copied it from FF.net

(Ichigo POV)

I hated him.

No, hate is too kind of a word to use…  _Loathe_  would be more appropriate. Despise, abhor, detest, whatever. They all mean the same thing, and that's the only thing that matters.

I hated him.

I  _hated_  him.

I hated  _myself_.

Yeah, that's right. It was  _my_ fault that I hated him in the first place. I invited the demon bastard into my head in the first place.  _I_  was the one who made that stupid fucking deal in the first place. And now I was paying for it with everything I had. My mind was slowly slipping away from me with each scream-filled nightmare I had. The image of blood soaking my hands and splattered all over my body was permanently burned into my retinas. It was all I saw whenever I closed my eyes.

And it was all. His. Fault.

Even just thinking about it, I heard his stupid cackle echoing through my head, audible only to me. He thought the trouble I was in  _because_  of him was funny. Hilarious, even. The fucking bastard had a twisted sense of humor, that was for sure.

' _ **Least I**_ **have** _ **a sense of humor, King.'**_

I could picture that snarky grin of his perfectly and it made my usual scowl turn into a full-blown pissed-off expression. I didn't say anything back. Doing so would only get him more riled up and cause me more harm than anything. That was honestly the last thing I needed at that moment. I didn't think the security officials of the juvenile detention center would have been too pleased with "me" destroying their cells. Again.

Fucking demon.

An irritated scoff was the only warning I had of  _him_  still listening.  _ **'Stupid human, I have a name. It's Shiro, 'member? Or did the cops beat ya so badly ya forgot?'**_  He laughed and I glared.

"Fuck off, stupid demon," I hissed, balling my hands into fists and partially enjoying the stinging feel of my nails digging into my skin. "I'm not in the mood to deal with your shit."

Shiro just laughed again, though I could feel his presence slowly fading from the front of my mind. At least he  _sometimes_  listened. But it was always when I hardly cared and never when it really mattered. Like when he randomly decided to go "hunting", as he called it, and I was screaming at him to give my body back. He never listened then – just continued on with what he was doing, his sadistic grin plastered on  _my_  face.

I hated him so much. And the stupid police who never believed a single word I said, even when I pleaded insanity. I practically  _begged_  them to lock me up in an asylum, just so Shiro couldn't hurt anyone else while using me to do it. But they thought I was completely fine. Even after they saw  _with their own eyes_ , Shiro taking control and killing three security guards, then just disappearing out of my mind. They said I was just acting to get off easy and instead threw me into a holding cell until my bail could be paid. As if anybody in my family had a hundred and fifty thousand dollars just lying around. No doubt about it, I was going to be stuck there for a long time.

After releasing a quick sigh I let my head fall into my hands. My arms were still speckled in dried blood and I could feel it in my hair too. They hadn't even let me wash it out before putting me in the cell. Fucking bastards. They might as well have been as bad as Shiro, making me sit there for God knows how long with blood everywhere.

' _ **That's not true, Aibou. I wouldn' even put ya in a jail cell in the first place. Thass no fun fer me.'**_

I rolled my eyes at Shiro's comment and leaned back against the grimy stone wall. "Yeah, because you can't do shit if I'm locked up."

The second I felt my mind darken was the second I regretted what I said. I saw a flash of Shiro's grin and glowing gold eyes before I was knocked back into my own mind. Within moments I was on the inside looking out, and the demon was in charge. I tried pushing him out of the way but a set of bars blocked me from doing anything.

Before I knew what was happening Shiro had pried the bars of the cell open and stepped out into the deserted hall. Well, previously deserted. A guard walked out from a room on the right and raised his gun defensively. I saw his eyes grow wide as Shiro laughed and lunged for the man. I couldn't do anything to stop it. Moments later there was fresh blood on "my" hands and face, once again. Struggling got me nowhere, and any attempts just made Shiro laugh.

" **Yer an idiot, King,"**  he sneered while picking up the keys from the dead guard's belt and unlocking the door. I growled in an almost animalistic way, but it fell on deaf ears. After that I gave up trying and instead just watched in disgust at what Shiro was doing.

He was on one of his hunts again. But the kills were quicker than usual – as if they were rushed. I was almost too afraid to ask.

' _Your kills aren't the same as before,'_  I mumbled, not wanting to sound interested. Of course, it failed miserably. But when Shiro replied his usual cocky tone was gone, along with the shortened and slurred words. Instead his voice was soft and serious as he strode through the front doors of the facility.

" **If you keep getting caught then I can't fulfill my end of the deal."**  He paused outside and raised his head – as if he were sniffing the air – before walking off confidently.  **"And I'm** _ **so**_ **looking forward to my payment for succeeding."**

I put on the best mental glare I was capable of and aimed it at Shiro. 'Payment? Like what?' Knowing the demon bastard it would be something bad.

As a reply all I got from him was a chuckle and a soft  **"You'll see"**  before he completely blocked me from anything and anything relating to my physical body. As a result I was left in the dark, not having any way to know what Shiro was doing, or planning on doing.

~*~o~*~o~*~o~*~

(Shiro POV)

The second Ichi was blocked off in a little corner of his mind, I broke off at a full-on sprint towards a dark and deserted alley. Usually this is when I'd try to find new prey, but I'd already been satisfied at the detention facility. And I needed to make sure King was hidden somewhere safe. He was an idiot when it came to evading law enforcement, and if he got his ass arrested one more time I might've had to resort to just eating him right where he stood. Or sat. Whichever came first.

Admittedly, him getting a brand-spanking-new criminal record was mostly my fault. But I had to get nourishment somehow, and taking it from my host certainly wasn't an option. If I did that I'd kill the poor guy. If that happened I wouldn't be able to get my payment, and most certainly would fade away into nothingness.

The more I thought about it, the more I realized that hiding Ichi would have a negative effect on me. But I'd promised him that I would help him fine his significant other. And hiding him is exactly where the two would meet. I knew Ichigo wasn't fond of the Underground, but there wasn't much of a choice for him. His "other half", as some would say, personally worked for his uncle, Kisuke Urahara. They needed to at least meet each other, and Kisuke was the only person who could make that happen.

In my train of thought I nearly ran right past the man's shop, skidding to a halt right in front of the door. The second I stopped it slid open, revealing a man in green with stubble on his chin and a striped hat. He grinned with only one look at me. Or rather, Ichigo. The only difference between Ichigo and me inhabiting Ichigo directly was the eyes and the personality.

"You aren't Ichigo, are you?" The man waved a fan in front of his face and looked out at me through the brim of his hat. From the tone of his voice it sounded as if he wanted to play some kind of game with me. But I wasn't in the mood for that, nor did I have the time.

" **Are you Kisuke Urahara?"**  I glared at him, wanting to snatch that fucking fan right out of his hand and smash it to pieces beneath my foot.

He seemingly completely ignored the harsh stare and nodded once. "The one and only. Now tell me… What are you doing in my nephew's body?"


	2. Lies Have Never Tasted Sweeter

(Grimmjow POV)

Sometimes I really hated working for Urahara. The bastard would call me up at all hours of the day and night for the stupidest things, from another player in his chess game to needing some help in his newest "experiment". It was ridiculous, really. I'd been half tempted to quit working for him, but the pay was too good for me to just up and leave. Plus I wasn't exactly the best at finding new jobs, since I always ended up scaring people off. So with that in mind I guess being employed under Mr. Hat-n-Clogs wasn't as bad as it could be. At least I didn't have to babysit.

Or… I thought I didn't have to.

When Urahara called me up at four in the morning I was expecting some bullshit excuse for his depriving me of sleep. Instead he sounded genuinely serious over the phone. He didn't explain any deeper than I'd be paid double my normal salary if I took the job, so I was pretty much in the dark. Even so I was up and outta bed before he could even finish talking, and arrived his shop in five minutes flat.

I walked in unannounced as usual. I'd long ago decided that if Hat-n-Clogs just kept bugging me then he didn't deserve any privacy. Just as I was about to slide the "living room" door open, I heard two voices – Urahara and somebody else that I didn't recognize with sort of a sly, watery tone when he spoke.

" **Ya sure he's the best?"**

"Of course! I wouldn't entrust my darling little nephew to some second-rate oaf like Nnoitora. Grimmjow is the best, by far."

I grinned. Getting a compliment like that certainly wasn't an everyday thing with Urahara, and I was soaking it up like a fucking sponge does water.

The watery voice scoffed lightly.  **"Fucking hope so. I dun want King gettin' caught again 'cause some arrogant asshole didn' know how ta do his job."** Arrogant? I wasn't arrogant! And I most certainly knew how to do my job better than that fucker Nnoitora. He'd fail at anything the second he saw a slutty bitch walk across his path. In the midst of my inner ranting I barely heard a sigh and the sound of something like a cup lightly hitting the table.  **"If I can' get Ichi what I promised 'im, then I'm good as dead."**  A pause.  **"Do this fer me, Kisuke. Please. Ya hafta make sure Grimmy and Ichi-"** The voice stopped abruptly and the sound of somebody standing reached my ears.

I nearly fell on my ass when the door slid open, revealing Urahara and his usual cocky grin, along with that goddamned fan. "Grimmjow. Didn't your mother ever tell you it was rude to eavesdrop?"

Already having succeeded in getting myself caught I opted out for shoving my hands into the pockets of my jeans and acting casual. "Yeah, yeah. What-the-fuck-ever. What'd ya want me for?"

The fan fluttered in front of Hat-n-Clog's face and he stepped to the side. A kid that had to be no older than eighteen sat at the end of the table, right across from the door. His bright orange hair was the first thing I noticed. It was so obnoxiously coloured that it rivaled my own baby blue hair, which was most definitely saying something. His head turned my way and I was met with the strangest pair of eyes I'd ever seen – a liquid gold on a deep, soul-sucking black. He wasn't looking at me though. His gaze was stuck on Urahara.

" **Don' fail me, Kisuke. I'm countin' on ya ta get the job done."** As he spoke the crazy inverted colours started receding into the corners of his eyes until all that was left was a rather dazed and blank set of chocolate irises. Then he just toppled over onto his side like limp doll.

Beside me, Urahara sighed and walked over to kneel next to the kid. "Protecting this boy is your next assignment. If you fail Shrio will have our heads." His fingers toyed with a spiked tip of the kid's hair, eyes focused on his face. I just nodded slowly and sat down against the wall.

"So what exactly do I need to protect him  _from_? And why?" It wasn't like the kid had assassins after him, right? "And who's Shiro?"

Urahara moved him over to lie on his back instead of curled up in a fetal position before saying anything. "This is Ichigo Kurosaki, my brother's son. Lately he's been getting into some trouble with the law and police everywhere want his ass behind bars." I arched an eyebrow questioningly and the shopkeeper just waved it off. "Shiro is his caretaker, I guess would be the best explanation. He's kind of like a second personality Ichigo's mind developed to keep him in check. He'll come out every once in a while but a shouldn't cause too much harm."

I nodded slowly, trying to take this all in. It was interesting, to say the least. But I'd still have to babysit the brat. I just hoped he could take care of himself and wouldn't need to rely on me doing everything for him. "So how long is this job gonna last?"

Hat-n-Clogs shrugged and I felt my eye twitch. "I guess that depends on how quickly things die down. Could be a few weeks. Months. Years, even."

"You're fucking kidding me!" I nearly fell over from standing so quickly, my hands balling into fists. I didn't have that kind of time to waste watching over some fucking delinquent. I had a life too, albeit a relatively nonexistent one. I still had a life. And I didn't wanna use it all up for this punk-ass kid who thought he could get away with anything. But at the same time the double pay wouldn't be half bad. Maybe though… "Triple my pay for this kid and you've gotta deal."

Just from the look on Urahara's half-hidden face, I could tell he wasn't pleased. But if this was really as important to him as he said it was, then he'd do it. A short nod was all I got in reply and immediately I was happier, even going so far as to sitting back down and actually relaxing for once.

"You'll start when Ichigo wakes up, but he won't know what happened here." He looked down at the kid and seemed to hunch over, like there was an invisible weight on his shoulders. "I would take care of him myself but it's not me that he needs…"

The statement had me confused but I thought it best not to ask and just nod along with what he was saying. Looking down at Ichigo, I noticed that he was strangely feminine for a man. His shoulders were smaller than most his age and he was a little more curvy. It was only when I was practically eye-raping him that I noticed the blood. The lighting in the room wasn't the brightest, so it wasn't a surprise that I'd missed it earlier. It caked his hair and made it clump up in odd spots, and his arms were covered in it. It looked freshest on his hands, but the closer it got to his elbows the older it looked.

Urahara must've noticed the frown that had crawled onto my face and stood. "That alone should tell you why he has the law after him." He stepped out of the room for a moment and I heard water running briefly before he came back with a bowl of water and a soft-looking sponge. He set it down next to Ichigo's head and dipped the sponge into the water, then wrung the excess water out before handing it to me. "I need to go retrieve some things, but you can start up on his arms. I'll help when I get back."

I nodded and reluctantly set at wiping the blood off of Ichigo's forearm. In boredom my eyes traveled down his arm to examine just how much of the stuff was actually there. I dragged the fingertips of my free hand through the wettest parts and came back with a shitload of it. In my profession I'd gotten bloody a fair share of times. But none of them even came close to being this bad. It made me wonder just what in the hell this boy did to get this covered in it.

When I caught a glimpse of the kid's eyebrows furrowing together, I stopped with the sponge and just sat there watching him. His eyes opened a few seconds later, then wandered over to me and narrowed on contact. He was gonna be trouble.

"Who the fuck are you?"

Just barely woke up and already a feisty bitch. Fan-fucking-tastic. I glared down at him, resisting the urge to throw the fucking sponge at his face. "You're rude, so why should I tell you anything?"

I didn't think his eyes could narrow any more than they did at that moment – in fact they were almost closed. But he didn't say anything and just looked down at his arm. The expression on his face turned confused as he slowly pushed himself up onto his elbows. "Were you giving me a sponge bath?"

The sponge hit the bowl of water with a loud splash and water sloshed everywhere. "Fucking Urahara made me do it, so don't think I was bein' nice or anything!"

"What'd I do?"

Both of our heads turned and stared as the shopkeeper walked into the room with a pile of papers and another sponge in hand. He smiled at the sight if Ichigo and set the papers down before helping the kid into a sitting position. The confused look on his face only got worse.

"Uncle Kisuke? What's going on?"

Urahara moved the bowl of water onto the table and dipped his sponge into it before taking Ichigo's other arm and working on cleaning it. "Shiro brought you here and said I needed to keep you safe."

The kid scoffed and looked away. "He's the one who keeps putting me in danger in the first place. It's his fault." If I hadn't have been staring at his face I would have missed the brief flash of gold in his eyes moments after he spoke and the shit-eating glare that appeared on his face. Urahara didn't even seem to notice in the slightest. He just shook his head like a parent would and continued working down Ichigo's arm. The only time he looked away was when he glanced up at me.

"Grimmjow, get his other arm cleaned off."

Holding back a string of curses I picked it up and started where I left off. Every once in a while I'd glance up at the kid and see him grimacing like he'd just seen something disgusting.

"I can clean myself, Kisuke," he mumbled, trying to pull his arm out of my grasp. I just grabbed his wrist and squeezed. It wasn't hard enough to break it, but enough to cause minor pain. He stopped almost immediately.

Out of the corner of my eye I barely saw Urahara shake his head. "You and I both know what happens if your arms aren't clean first."

I didn't want to be curious about what Hat-n-Clogs was talking about, but it was difficult not to when Ichigo shuddered almost violently and winced. The only people I'd seen react to something internal like that were those who came back from brutal wars, or those who had seen something so traumatizing they had troubles with everything. I had a feeling that whatever it was, neither of them were gonna tell me. I hated secrets with a passion, almost as much as I hated lies. They didn't get anybody anywhere in life and were just a waste of time.

Halfway through scrubbing off the blood on Ichigo's wrists and hands, he started getting this constipated look on his face. Urahara looked worried. I could've cared less. But when he yanked his hand out of my grip and backhanded me across the face, I most definitely cared. I almost screamed at the little fucker, but he was out the door and dashing down the hall before I could even take a breath. I heard a door slam shut and my eyes widened slightly. I turned to Urahara.

"The fuck's his problem?"

The shopkeeper didn't answer. He just stood, took the sponges and water in hand, and walked out of the room. In the time span of the door being open I heard the shattering of glass and a muffled scream before it closed and the sound was cut off.

Something was definitely wrong with this kid, and I wanted to know what.


	3. Faulty Manufacturing

(Ichigo POV)

The second I locked the bathroom door I lost it. My fist rammed into the mirror, sending spider webs of cracks along its silvery surface and throbbing waves of pain up my arm. I could feel blood dripping through my closed fist and there was no doubt that glass was stuck in my hand—and I didn't give a flying fuck.

I was gonna  _kill_ Shiro.

' _ **Ya wouldn' kill me, King. Couldn' even get close, even if ya tried yer hardest.'**_

I could practically see the cocky grin on his face and screamed. My voice cracked pathetically as I sunk to my knees, cradling my injured hand against my chest. I knew I had to get the glass out before Shiro's regeneration kicked in and healed around the shards. I definitely didn't feel like cutting into newly healed skin to get them out, but I didn't want to leave the bathroom either—didn't want Kisuke to see me like this. I felt weak. The sound of Shiro sighing barely registered in my befuddled mind.

' _ **If ya don' go ta Kisuke and get that shit outta yer hand I'll do it fer ya.'**_

I resisted screaming again and stood shakily, reaching for the door to unlock it. The second I did it slid open to reveal Kisuke standing there, looking worried.

"Is he bothering you that much?" I didn't want to answer, but I nodded and directed my gaze down at the floor. He reached out and gently took my hand to inspect it, turning it this way and that. It was still covered in blood that wasn't mine and the cuts were difficult to distinguish. Kisuke knew what he was doing though.

He ended up leading me down the hall into his own l bedroom, then into an adjoining bathroom. I sat on the edge of the bathtub and stared at my hands while the shopkeeper worked on them. I didn't even flinch when I felt a pair of tweezers digging into the cuts to get the glass out. Shiro was silent for once, and it didn't even feel like he was angry. Worried, maybe; this was weird for him because half the time he didn't give a shit about what happened to me.

"He really does care, you know."

I looked up at Kisuke slowly, chewing on my lower lip. Our eyes met for a moment before he directed his gaze back down to my hand.

"If he didn't care then he wouldn't want you to be safe."

A scoff broke through my lips before I had a chance to stop it.

"If he wanted me to be safe he wouldn't use my body to kill people all the time." I felt Shiro's interest peak at this but I just shoved it away, wincing slightly when Kisuke removed a piece of glass as long and as wide as my thumb.

He sighed quietly as he dropped the shard into the trash bin. "It's how his kind lives, Ichigo… They feed off the energy they get from hurting and killing people."

I scowled and turned my head away, Shiro muttering something about him telling the truth.

"Why couldn't it be something else?" I stared up at Kisuke expectantly, but he didn't say anything.

Shiro answered me, though his voice was quieter when he spoke. Almost like before when I wouldn't leave the bathroom.

' _ **We can but 's dangerous. Our hosts are at risk of bein' killed if we use th' alternative. An' if I lose ya then 'm basically dead.'**_

Despite wondering what the alternative was, I didn't press the subject. By now Kisuke had finished with my hand and was neatly bandaging it up even though it wasn't necessary. With that demon's regeneration it'd be nothing more than a scar in a day or two. Not that the shopkeeper cared. He'd still make me re-bandage and clean it in a few hours.

After putting the medical supplies away Kisuke led me to a spare bedroom.

"You can sleep here for tonight," he said with his usual smile as I stepped into the room. It was simple, with a low futon shoved up against a wall and a small folding table leaning against the wall. "Tomorrow I'll escort you to Grimmjow's house, where you'll be staying until you and Shiro complete the deal." I nodded and stopped in the middle of the room before turning back to Kisuke. He offered a simple "Good night" before sliding the door shut and leaving me to myself.

I slipped out of my bloody clothes and into a sort of sleeping kimono that had been laid out on the futon. When I ran a hand through my hair I grimaced. I never did wash my hair, but at the moment I was too tired to care. I just wanted this day to be over with already. Too many things had happened for my liking.

~*~o~*~o~*~o~*~

(Shiro POV)

As soon as Ichi had fallen asleep I slithered through his mind and gently took the control from him. Thankfully he was so passed out he didn't even stir, so worrying about him screaming at me to give him his body back wasn't likely to happen. I just hated it when he did that. It made me feel unwelcome, even though he was the one who let me in in the first place.

"My" eyes opened and scanned the room quickly. Despite the darkness I was able to see everything perfectly, and nothing was out of place. Sometimes I loved being a demon. Enhanced senses were fantastic things to have most of the time. At other times they just let you know about things you rather wouldn't have known about. Right now, that's an advantage. Everybody was asleep, so that meant I could go snoop around.

I slid the door to Ichigo's room open and stepped silently out into the hallway. To my left and down a few feet was the door to Kisuke's room, where he was snoring so loudly it could wake a rock up. To the right was the second guest room, where Grimmjow was. It was a little surprising to find him here. I thought he'd have just gone home to sleep. But I wasn't complaining. It just meant I could go gather some extra info on him.

I strode silently towards Grimmjow's room and slid the door slid open as quietly as possible. The two guest rooms were the same, the only difference being that Grimm's clothes were thrown haphazardly into a corner. I started towards the bed and the lightly-snoring man, needing to hold back a cackle of glee. Grimmy wasn't wearing  _anything_ , which could possibly mean that he did so every night. Maybe he even walked around like that in the morning when he woke up. If Ichi sees that, then things between them might just get heated. He'd be blushing like a fucking schoolgirl and I would probably laugh, meaning King would get pissed at me. But that wouldn't matter as long as they hit it off.

It was the reason why King had proposed the deal in the first place. He was so tired of being alone it was damn near unbearable. I told him when we first met that I could help him get rid of that loneliness and he told me to do it. And if I wanted to do that than him and Grimmy needed to develop feelings for each other.

Speaking of Grimmjow… He looked so damn sexy, lying there with only half of his body covered. The moonlight shining in through the window hit his back and defined the muscled contours perfectly. His hair was splayed all over the place and one arm was hanging off the edge of the futon. The blanket just barely covered his butt, the thin material clinging and leaving nothing to the imagination.

Fuck, if Ichi didn't like this then there was seriously something wrong with him. I could've stared at that  _God_  until the world ended had it not been for the sudden feeling of blood rushing to "my" dick. I grimaced slightly and realized that I'd have to get rid of the little problem before I let King back in control.

I was about to leave Grimmjow's room when a brilliant idea struck me. Moving back over to him and kneeling lightly on the edge of the bed, my hands found the empty space of the futon on either side of his upper back. I lowered myself down next to his neck and inhaled softly, eyes fluttered shut at the musky scent as a soft hum making itself heard in the otherwise quiet room. He stirred beneath me and I couldn't help the grin that tugged at my lips. His eyes opened slowly, drowsiness swirling around lazily in the beautiful blue orbs. God, his eyes looked like a deep cerulean sea. I just wanted to jump into them and swim around. But if I did that then I'd be stuck inside Grimm instead of Ichi, and then we'd have a serious problem.

Grimmjow's eyes focused slowly on mine and his eyebrows furrowed together. "Ichigo…?"

The grin grew wider as I held back a chuckle and shook my head. The bastard didn't even know the difference between us. How pathetic.

" **Can' even tell us apart, can ya, Grimmy?"** I scoffed and his eyes doubled their size.  **"Pathetic, really. 'Ow can ya protect Ichi when ya don' even know me from 'im?"**

He sat up and had "me" pinned down on the futon within seconds, which was admittedly rather impressive. Grimm was practically growling with a murderous glare plastered to his face.

"Well, if you need  _me_  to protect him then you aren't doing a very good fucking job, are ya?"

While he did have a point, I wasn't going to admit it. I just grinned even more.

" **I wasn' created to** _ **protect**_ **'im, jackass. Juss guide 'im in the right direction an' give 'im advice, not tha he takes any of it seriously."**  Only half of that was a lie. Of course, I wasn't created for Ichi at all, though I did occasionally talk him out of some really stupid decisions.

" **I guided 'im to ya 'cause I knew you were the best at wha' ya did; 'cause if anyone could protect Ichi, it was you."**

Grimm's grip on my shoulders tightened and he just stared down at me. He didn't even say anything; he just stared, and it started to piss me off. I leaned up and licked a line up from his jawbone to the corner of his eyebrow, nearly laughing at his appalled expression. In his desperation to get the saliva off his face he let me go completely and then it was my turn to pin  _him_  down. He started struggling to break free and landed a punch to my chest and right thigh. The impact was hard enough to bruise for sure, but not enough to break anything.

"Get the fuck off of me, asshole!" He hardly looked threatening at all, just mindlessly flailing around at that point. It was such a weak attempt that it wasn't even worth laughing at. I pinned his arms above his head and glared down at him.

" **I know you may hate me, and may not give a shit about Ichi but I swear on deepest pit of Hell I** _ **will**_ **kill you if he gets hurt because you won't do your job."** I was dead fucking serious too. And whenever that happened all of the slurs left my voice. Anybody who knew me well enough knew that I wasn't joking around when that happened. Even Grimmjow seemed to notice, which was kind of surprising because he had seemed so dimwitted up until then.

He stopped struggling, thankfully, so I let go of his arms and leaned down next to his ear.

" **Don' fuck with me, Grimmy,"**  I mumbled before nipping harshly at his neck and rising from the futon. Grimmjow hissed in displeasure and I heard him sit up, but I didn't turn back to look. I paused just before slipping out into the hallway.

" **Don' tell Ichi this happened either. He wouldn' be too happy 'bout it."**

Once his door was shut I strode into Ichi's room and fell down onto the futon before swiping a hand over where Grimm had landed a hit on my chest. Thankfully it'd be gone in the morning before Ichigo even knew what had happened tonight. Fuck, if King knew about what I'd done I doubted he'd be too happy about it. He wouldn't be happy about his body being worn out either, so I slinked back into the recesses of Ichigo's mind and carefully nudged him back in control. Hopefully, he wouldn't have to know about tonight's events.


	4. These Friends, They Don't Love You

(Grimmjow POV)

When Urahara said that Ichigo would be  _living_  with me, I flipped out.

Meeting Shiro last night made me even less enthusiastic about watching over him than I had been before. The kid's "second personality" was fucking creepy and psychotic on top of it all, not to mention that he had a boner for the first little while of our… Conversation, up until he got all serious and threatened my life. Then it was just like the fucking thing had deflated, as weird as it may sound. Either way, the fucker creeped me out more than Szayel and Nnoitora, which was saying something.

I tried complaining but Hat-n-Clogs just dismissed it with a wave of his fucking fan and walked away, leaving me standing alone in the main room. Even though he denied all of my attempts at getting out of this shitty excuse of a job he still promised to pay me triple, so at least that was a good thing. And maybe having the delinquent around would make my life more exciting. Until the fucking  _demonic_ side of him came out to play, anyways. Then I'd just have to worry about keeping my balls intact.

Off to the side I heard the door slid open. I almost didn't look but there was that natural curiosity that got the best of me. I should have known that it was Ichigo who stood in the doorframe, but with clean hair and clothes he seemed almost unrecognizable. Granted, he still looked like shit. But compared to yesterday this seemed like nothing. My eyes wandered over his figure and stopped at a white bandaged hand clutching something to his chest. The other hung at his side, holding a medium-sized duffle bag.

"I'm sorry about yesterday," he said while stepping into the room and letting the bag fall to the floor. "It wasn't exactly one of my best days ever."

I nodded and followed his hand as he set the other things down onto the table. It certainly didn't look like much – just a rectangular box and a weird-looking metal thing.

The box was just plain brown cardboard, maybe about a foot long. The metal object, upon closer inspection, was a lotus with different sized holes poked into the center. It seemed to be made out of some weird yellow-ish metal, almost like a really dull gold or something. The kid must've noticed me staring at it because he sat in front of the objects and ran his fingers along the petals of the flower.

"It's an incense holder. Kisuke said it might help. Ya know if… Shiro needed to be calmed down or something…"

I scoffed at sat across the table from him. "What's an incense holder gonna do to help calm him?" Unless it turned him to stone when the creepy bastard came out to play. Or maybe that was what the box was for…

Ichigo picked it up and opened it, then pulled out a long thin stick with a deep red powder-type stuff covering half of it. He took a lighter out of his pocket and lit the red end of the stick, then placed it in one of the holes on the lotus. It started smoking and sending the scent of fire and thunderstorms into the air.

"Kisuke said it's a calming scent to more… Aggressive people." His eyes closed and he inhaled deeply. A sly smile formed on his lips, one that almost looked like the one Shiro wore the previous night. "I can already feel him subsiding…"

This kid was officially fucking crazy, no matter what Hat-n-Clogs said otherwise. The incense scent was more of something that seemed like it would aggravate somebody instead of calming them. It was hard to see how it would work, but maybe Urahara would explain it more.

It was actually only a few minutes later that he walked into the room with his cane and fan in hand.

_That motherfucking fan._

Someday I was gonna break that stupid thing. He walked over and picked up Ichigo's duffle bag, then threw it at me. I just barely caught it before it could hit me in the face.

"What the fuck was that for?" I repositioned it in my arms so I could see over it and glared daggers at the shitty shopkeeper, who was just smiling and handing the kid his stuff after putting the lit incense out.

"I think you can manage carrying one bag, Grimmjow." Underneath the brim of his hat his eyes twinkled and he walked out the door. Ichigo followed with myself a few steps behind, mumbling curses every step of the way.

Urahara led us straight to my own home – a decent sized modern house with tall wood fences and even taller bamboo growing inside the perimeter. I liked my privacy, and a seven-foot-tall fence with a shit-ton of bamboo everywhere was perfect. Inside the fence, leading up to the house from the gate was a simple stone pathway with grass growing in between the stones, and then more grass spreading out to form a small yard. I walked straight up to the front door, unlocked it, and stepped inside. The bag slipped from my arms and fell next to the door while I strode into the kitchen and grabbed an apple.

I could hear Ichigo and Urahara talking, though I didn't bother to pay attention to what they were saying. I was more interested in my cat, who was standing on the counter next to me and rubbing her head against my arm. I scratched her ears with my free hand and smiled down at her.

"Hey there, Pantera," I said softly, happy to see her. The  _only_  time I allowed any tenderness to enter my voice was when I was talking to her.

"Did ya miss me?" She looked up at me with bright blue eyes, the same colour as mine, her white fur shining in the sunlight streaming in through the windows. I didn't even bother to look up when Urahara walked into the kitchen.

"I'm leaving now, but if you need any help you know how to reach me."

I nodded and finished off my apple before walking into the living room. Ichigo stood next to the door, staring at everything with the most dumbfounded expression on his face I'd ever seen. The only time it changed was when Hat-n-Clogs put a hand on his shoulder and kissed his temple before walking out the door. He looked almost scared, but it immediately turned into a scowl the second the door closed.

It was awkwardly silent for minutes after that, the both of us just glaring at each other. The only one oblivious to the whole thing was Pantera, who was busy purring like a lawn mower and rubbing up against my legs. She completely ignored Ichigo, as she did with most newcomers in the house. Tired of the silence, I sighed and picked up the duffle bag from the floor.

"Well… Might as well show ya where you're gonna be staying," I mumbled, leading Ichigo down a hall and to a room on the left side of the hallway. I strode in and dropped his bag onto the bed before leaning up against a blank silver wall. The kid walked in and stopped in the middle of the room. He nodded once, which I took to mean a "thank you, this'll do amazingly well". Whether that was what he actually meant or not, I didn't care. But I did care about the fact that he didn't even say anything. He wasn't even  _doing_  anything – just staring at nothing.

If there was one thing I hated more than lies and secrets, it was people staring. I hated it when people stared. I didn't even know why. It just bothered the living fuck outta me to the point where I wanted to punch them in their stupid faces.

The rage lessened slightly when he moved to set the incense stuff down onto the nightstand next to the bed, but I still wanted to slap him. So I grabbed the back of his shirt and pinned him up against the exact same wall I'd been leaning against. One hand shoved his face into the wall while the other trapped his arms behind his back. The kid actually struggled to get away, which made me laugh.

"Now listen here,  _boy_ ," I hissed into his ear, tightening my grip on his arms whenever it felt like he was about to break loose. "You're in  _my_  house now, so you'll follow  _my_  rules, got it?" I waited until he nodded before continuing. "Don't take anything from the kitchen unless I say so. Don't leave your shit lyin' everywhere. Clean up after yourself. Leave everything of mine where it is. Don't  _stare_ , and for the love of all that is holy,  _do not_  leave my territory unless Kisuke or I are with you. Understand?" Another nod and I saw him starting to get pissed. It only made me grin more. "Failure to comply to these  _simple_  rules will result in punishment."

Through bright orange bangs his eyes grew steely and cold, his lips curling up in what appeared to be a snarl. "So now you're threatening me if I don't follow your rules?" He laughed once, a loud bark-like sound that had me applying even more pressure to his head and arms. "As if you could even go through with it."

He was  _so_  goddamned lucky that Urahara would skin me if I'd ever hurt his "darling nephew" to the point where it pushed the 'fatal' mark.

"That's exactly what I'm saying,  _punk._  Just because you can get away with murdering people doesn't mean you can do what you please under  _my_  roof."

The smirk that had come with the laugh had vanished completely, leaving a glare icy enough to freeze Hell over. Swirling brown irises flashed a liquid gold and I was barely able to see the black bleeding into the corners of his eyes through his hair. The only thing I had time to register was the fact that I'd just awoken the figurative "beast" before I hit the floor so hard my head bounced off the thinly carpeted surface at least three times. Through my spinning vision the only thing I could see was one hazy gold-on-black eye and the other brown and half black.

" _You think that_ I _murdered those people?"_ Ichigo growled, his voice sounding like him and Shiro were talking at the same time.  _"Do you really think that I would stoop so low as to killing somebody?"_ I bit my lip when a jolt of pain rushed up my right thigh – he was digging his knee into my fucking leg. My face must've shown the pain because the kid laughed, right in my ear.  _"Do you have_ any _idea what Shiro has made me do?"_

I was just about to ask what when that demented cackle echoed through my brain and the pain in my leg subsided. Above me, Ichigo grinned, showing a set of perfect white teeth and an alarmingly long set of canines. This wasn't a simple case of split personality, I knew that much right then. This was something much, much more than that.

" **Really, Grimmy. Ya think I'd let ya threaten King like tha'?"**  Shiro made a 'tsk'ing sound and shook his head as if he were scolding me.  **"Such a bad boy. I'd think that I'd hafta punish ya fer somethin' like that. Like ya warned Ichi ya'd do if he broke yer rules."** I shivered when he licked his lips and at the same time, leaned in towards my face. I glared and tried to get away but suddenly it was as if the kid weighed a ton. The second I felt his breath on my ear I froze up completely.  **"Ya threatenin' him like that, Grimmy, is ya** _ **not**_ **doin' yer job and lettin' 'im get hurt. An' I'm still holdin' by mah offer to kill ya if that happens."**

I just nodded quickly and bit back a growl that surely would have gotten half of my face ripped off. "Wouldn' want that, would we?"

Shiro laughed and pulled back until our faces were just inches apart.  **"Yes, God forbid tha happens."** His tongue flicked out and caught the tip of my nose. I grimaced and was about to yell at the bastard when the inverted-ness of his eyes slowly bled out, revealing blank chocolate orbs. I didn't even know what was happening before the kid before he fell limply onto my chest. Hell, I barely managed to avoid his face smashing into mine. Had I not turned my head away both of us might have had broken noses.

Flipping Ichigo over off of me and onto his back, I'd hoped that this wasn't something I had to get used to. Taking care of an unconscious teenager after every time Shiro decides to come out wasn't something I wanted to do. I didn't wanna take care of the brat in the first place. But Kisuke promised me triple. And if he didn't keep that promise I'd be more than sure to get back at him.

~*~o~*~o~*~o~*~

(Shiro POV)

This was bad…

I'd seen it the second he attacked Ichi. All Grimmjow wanted was the money Kisuke was offering in return for taking care of him. He didn't even give a fuck about King in the first place. I'd known from the beginning that Grimmy was meant to be with Ichi – I saw their entire future together with my own two eyes. But making it happen was proving to be harder than expected.

I'd been told before that forcing two people to fall head over heels for each other was impossible, if one wanted it to be pure love. The feelings had to be brought to the surface, then refined, then polished until they shone and were as perfect as emotions could get.

But how could this love work out if one of the two halves was only in this for money?


	5. I Live On Raw Emotion, Baby

(Ichigo POV)

The second I had stepped foot into Grimmjow's "territory", as he called it, I knew immediately that I wasn't welcome in the least. Every time I walked past him he'd glare at me like I'd just killed his cat or insulted his mother. It was pissing me off more than it should have. I mean, I didn't fucking ask to have a babysitter – that was Shiro's doing.

I heard him laugh shortly at my comment.  _ **'Ya may not've asked ta 'ave one, but I thought ya needed one so tha' should be enough fer ya.'**_

If he had a face that wasn't mine I would've punched him right in the middle of it. Despite that I just ignored his comment and stared at the ceiling of my room. Grimmjow may have been a total asshole but he had a nice taste in colour. The walls were a metallic silver and the trim was a deep teal. What little furniture that occupied the room was some sort of black wood and looked really expensive. Seeing just my room made me wonder what the rest of the house looked like. I'd barely been able to see how the rest of the house was decorated, since I'd hardly left my new room at all.

Grimmjow had made it very clear that he didn't want me wandering all over the place, but since he wasn't home I figured no harm, no foul. He'd mentioned that morning at breakfast that he needed to go shopping for some things and would be gone for most of the day. So that just left me and his cat, and I doubted the feline would mind me looking around a little. It should've been fine as long as I didn't touch anything.

I rose from the bed and strode over to the door, which was a shade of grey so light it looked white. For some reason it reminded me of Shiro's skin, which made the demon chuckle.

' _ **It's nice of ya ta compare ma skin ta a door, King,'**_ he said in a mockingly kind voice that made me roll my eyes as I stepped out into the hall.

The walls were that same shade of silver, only with black trim instead of blue and dark hardwood floors instead of carpet. To my left were two other doors – one at the end of the hall and the other on the opposite wall across from me. I already knew that the two doors led to a bathroom and Grimmjow's bedroom, and I was pretty sure that if I went into Grimm's room I'd get my balls cut off. So instead I just wandered into the living room.

The silver of the hallway ended abruptly at the corner, where a deep grey took over and encased the open room. There was a black leather couch positioned in front of a low glass coffee table and a white rug underneath. To the left there was the kitchen, which was blocked away by a wall with a sort of window cut out of it. So if somebody were washing the dishes they could see what was going on in the living room. There were two large window spaced out evenly apart on each wall in the living room, and between two hung a rather large flat screen TV.

Admittedly, Grimmjow had a nice little house. The couch looked like the most comfortable thing ever, and when I sat down on it my suspicions were confirmed. I practically moaned at how soft and comfortable it was. Despite all the squishiness of the couch, Shiro felt nervous about something. If he could've been pacing that's probably what he'd be doing. To my surprise he agreed with me, but didn't say anything.

Grimmjow's cat jumped up onto my lap and nearly made me squeak in surprise. She started rubbing up against my chin and purring, and it honestly made me smile. Her owner may hate me but at least she liked me. I started petting her behind her ears and she purred even louder, settling down in my lap and pressing her head into my hand. I really liked the cat. Grimmjow, not so much.

Shiro's aggravated cry immediately made my head start throbbing.  _ **'King, yer supposed ta**_ **like** _ **Grimmy, not hate 'im!'**_ Needless to say I was slightly surprised at his random outburst. Or maybe it wasn't random…

I just sighed and pulled my legs up onto the couch, sitting indian-style. The cat meowed in complaint but settled down quickly and resumed begging for attention.  _'Why the fuck do I_ need _to like the bastard? He's an asshole!'_

My vision blurred for a second before returning to normal. When it did Shiro seemed calmer, for some reason.  _ **'Because, Ichi. Ya hafta like 'im, no matter 'ow much of a bastard he is.'**_ He sighed.  _ **'I promised ya I'd help find someone fer ya ta be with, an' Grimmy is the one I found.'**_

At this I frowned. How could that even be possible? We hated each other! To the point where we nearly tore each other's throats out the day before when I got here. It didn't make sense how two people like us could love each other.

Again, Shiro sighed.  _ **'It doesn't 'ave ta make sense, it jus has ta happen. An ta do that ya need ta get on his good side. 'Kay?'**_ If he had his own body he'd probably be kneeling in front of me, grabbing my shoulders and making eye contact. Or forcing me to do what he said. Either way it worried me and made me curious.

' _I don't get it… Why does this have to happen? And why him?'_ So many questions raced through my mind, but one in particular stood out the most.  _'Why do you care so much?'_

To be honest I think that one caught Shiro off guard the most. He almost seemed to slink back into my mind, kind of like a wounded animal or a shy child. I felt the aura around him change in a way I couldn't possibly describe. But it didn't feel like the usual cocky, bloodthirsty Shiro. It was as if he were weak and vulnerable.

' _ **Because... I need this just as much as you do.'**_

' _Need what?'_ I was so confused and wrapped up in my thoughts thatI hadn't noticed I'd stopped petting the cat until she put her paws on my chest and started licking my face. It made me laugh a little and shake my head, kissing her nose gently. She meowed at me and started nuzzling the underside of my chin again. In the midst of this Shiro seemed to have vanished, receding so far into my mind I could barely feel him.

"Shiro?"

Usually talking out loud gave me a stronger reaction from him, but I got nothing. It was almost like he'd disappeared. If I wasn't worried before, I was now. He'd never done this before, and I wasn't used to not feeling his presence in the back of my mind. It'd grown to be comforting after a while and now I felt even more alone than ever. I briefly thought that the incense Kisuke gave me might help, but it was just supposed to calm him down, not draw him out.

Thinking about anything major made my head hurt and instead I directed my attention back to the cat in my lap. It was then that I realized that I didn't even know her name. I thought Grimmjow had said it sometime last night, but I couldn't remember.

' _ **S Pantera.'**_

I jumped slightly at Shiro's sudden reply, his voice sounding louder and clearer than ever. "Fuck, Shiro, don't scare me like that." He mumbled something that sounded like an apology but I just shoved it off. "What the hell happened to you? Ya just vanished."

He didn't answer immediately, but when he did it wasn't even in relation to the question I'd asked.  _ **'I 'aven't been totally honest with ya, Ichi,'**_ he said quietly with an almost guilty tone to his voice. I frowned but didn't say anything.  _ **'Kisuke already told ya 'ow I survive most of th' time, an' ya asked if there was any other way ta do it.'**_

I nodded, smiling slightly when Pantera started nibbling on my fingertips. "Yeah. And you said that if you were to go through with it I could get hurt."

' _ **Or killed…'**_ I nodded again, biting my lower lip nervously. This conversation really wasn't going in a very pleasant direction, but I was curious and wanted to know what Shiro was getting at. He answered a few moments later.  _ **'Well… Tha happens 'cause the alternative is th' opposite of pain an' death an' anger .'**_

Things slowly began to click into place. The opposite of those are pleasure, life, and love. One of those was the thing he offered to help me with, back when we made the deal almost six months ago. But why would it kill me?

Shiro sighed, and I could vividly imagine him shaking his head in disappointment.  _ **'Everythin' a human is, is life, love, an' pleasure. Life is longer than death. Pleasure can come from pain. Anger can turn inta love. Th' positive are more potent an' powerful than the negative; they 'ave more meanin' an' are more precious.'**_

I could feel the pieces assembling themselves in my mind, but things were still missing. Like, what did it all mean? Shiro felt as if he were going to strangle me, he was so frustrated.  _ **'Ya really dun understand, do ya King?'**_ I shook my head and looked down at Pantera, who was dozing in my lap and making my leg fall asleep.  _ **'If I take all those away, then there's nothin' left,'**_ he hissed. I felt him pressing the boundaries I'd built in my mind to keep him confined, trying to break them. It was a struggle to keep him confined, and my vision kept blurring in and out of focus. Despite this, he still kept talking, now completely serious and almost scary-sounding.

' _ **Love, life, and pleasure is all you stupid humans live off of,'**_ he growled, slamming into the barrier. At the same time my head throbbed painfully and my grip on Pantera tightened. But he didn't stop, his voice bordering hysterical.  _ **'It's so easy to take away any of those, but so difficult to earn them. Every one of you wants pleasure from succeeding at something or from a lover. Every one of you wants to love and be loved in return. Every one of you wants fucking**_ **life** _ **.'**_

He continued beating away at my control, his own mind gone and out of reach. With every throb of my head I curled in on myself even more and was that much closer to losing myself. Pantera squirmed out of my grasp and sat next to me on the couch, meowing in what seemed like concern and nudging her head against my arm. I felt the barrier crack with a particularly strong hit, followed by a maniacal cackle of glee and the loss of vision in my right eye.

I couldn't let this happen again, or else Shiro would just hurt more people and get Grimmjow in trouble. Why I cared about him at that moment, I didn't know or even bother to understand. What was left of my sane mind told me to find a way to calm Shiro down or else all hell would break loose. Then it hit me, right as he sent another large crack throbbing through my mind.

_The incense._

It worked before, so it had to work now. I just had to get it.

Thankfully, Grimmjow had moved it out into the living room during dinner last night, when Shiro had started getting a little out of hand again. There was still half of an entire stick left – all I needed to do was light the damn thing. But I didn't know where the lighter was, and I was half blind. Plus there was the fact that I was quickly losing the ability to think straight the closer Shiro got to breaking free.

I fumbled around the coffee table, desperately searching for that little plastic lighter that I'd brought with me. It should have been somewhere relatively close to the incense burner, since there really didn't seem to be a reason for it to be anywhere else. But I couldn't find it. Maybe it had fallen onto the floor? I didn't know. Shiro was making it hard to think. Every hit was a moan of pain escaping my lips and even blurrier vision. I almost screamed when something soft and furry brushed up against my arm, then remembered that Grimmjow had a cat. She seemed to be helping me, almost – like she knew where the lighter was.

I reached out and touched her back, following where she went. I ended up on the floor in between the couch and coffee table with one hand still on the cat and the other brushing blindly over the fluffy rug. My hand rammed into the legs of the coffee table more than a few times, making Shiro laugh – no doubt about my attempts to find that fucking lighter.

' _ **Ya think ya can stop me, King? Well,**_ **think again** _ **!'**_

There was one last hit to that mental wall and everything around me exploded into what seemed to be a battle for dominance – one that Shiro was quickly winning. He kept on laughing and trying to shove me out of the way so he could take over, but I wouldn't let him. I honestly almost caved when my fingers brushed up against a familiar cylinder of plastic. The lighter.

Now that I had it, I just had to light the incense and wait for something to happen. Pulling myself up onto my knees, I gripped the coffee table with one hand while the other tried to coax a flame from the lighter. My hands were shaking so much and my vision kept threatening to go out. Relying on touch was the only thing I could do, albeit not the best thing.

When I reached up and grabbed the incense stick, it startled Shiro enough for me to light the end and for it to start smoking. For a few seconds nothing happened. But as the scent spread out over the room, I felt Shiro's rage start to lessen. My eyesight returned and my hands stopped shaking, but my head felt like it was being pierced by a railroad spike and filled with cotton at the same time. Soon enough everything went fuzzy again and I barely got the sense of my consciousness fading away. When it finally did, I welcomed the blackness with open arms.


	6. So Let The Flames Begin

(Grimmjow POV)

I really hate shopping.

It isn't even the basic concept of 'shopping' that I hate. It's the people I had to deal with while doing it; cranky soccer moms, screaming children, cashiers who act like assholes, the list goes on and on. That's the exact reason why I preferred going shopping early in the morning or late at night, when there was nobody to bother me. This current shopping adventure, however, was at ten in the  _fucking_  morning. Being the kind and thoughtful person that I am, I decided to wait until Ichigo woke up to see if he needed anything. Worst fucking mistake  _ever_. One look at the supermarket parking lot and I almost turned around and went home.

But I was running low on things. Like food and shampoo and vodka. Vodka was a necessity, along with most other kinds alcohol except beer. I hated beer with a passion. It tasted like shit and gave me heartburn from hell, so I had a tendency to avoid it.

Luckily, the list I'd made earlier was short and I was able to walk out in less than fifteen minutes with two big reusable tote bags full of shit.

Thankfully, I didn't live very far from the supermarket, so I just walked instead of taking my motorcycle. Though now I was slightly regretting it. I looked like a single stay-at-home mom, carrying a couple fucking  _flower print_   _tote bags_  full of groceries. I was almost humiliated, but it was better than being covered in blood like Ichigo had been when I first saw him.

Speaking of Ichigo, I hoped he wasn't messing around with anything. Or in my room. Fuck, his ass would be  _mine_  if he were in my room – figuratively and literally speaking. I'd never let anybody in my room, even if they were a friend or a fling. Shit, the latter got what they wanted in the spare bedroom. I wasn't gonna have some random guy in  _my_  bed, cumming all over  _my_  sheets. It never happened before, and it never will.

At that thought an image of Ichigo popped up into my head; writhing all over the place in pleasure, making delicious little sounds, my cock slamming into him until he bled or passed out.

It almost made me drop everything. I shuddered and pushed the thought out of my mind as quickly as I possibly could. God, anything even remotely close to that made me never wanna look at the kid again. Or even look at my bed. I swore to myself a long time ago that if I ever fucked anybody in my bed, I would either do two things. One, move to a different country and burn my mattress. Two, accept the fact that I love somebody and do it over and over again. Neither of those were  _ever_  going to happen. So as I walked up to my house and unlocked the door, I completely ignored the thought.

The door swung open, revealing a quiet and clean house. A quick look around told me that nothing was out of place, so I smirked and walked inside into the kitchen. A small thump made me look up into the living room in time to see Pantera staring up at me. She meowed loudly and I grinned, walking around to pick her up.

"Hey there, pretty girl. Didja miss me?"

She licked my chin and started squirming around; trying to get out of my arms, I assumed. It was weird of her to do that, but she  _was_  a cat, after all. I almost shoved it off as nothing until she started meowing again – like she was trying to get my attention. Well, she had it, alright. She seemed to notice this, so she jumped up onto the back of the couch and flicked her tail at me.

I frowned, now completely confused and slightly worried. "Pantera, what is it?"

Another meow and she disappeared onto the couch cushions. I sighed and followed her, expecting to see some kind of small animal she caught. But instead, it was Ichigo, laying face-down on the floor. Pantera was standing next to him, half underneath the coffee table, nudging his cheek with her head and crying.

Whatever thought I had that the kid was just acting to freak me out immediately flew out the window when Pantera started scratching his arm and nothing happened. Her claws were fucking sharp as shit – you'd have to be either comatose or dead not to have  _any_  reaction at all to them; which was exactly what Ichigo was doing.

I'd dropped to my knees almost immediately and rolled him over onto his back. The bloodstain on his forehead was the first thing that caught my attention. That could've explained why he was on the floor and knocked out. But it didn't explain why there was a lighter in his hand. Then again, the incense in the burner from last night was now completely gone. So he must've lit it. But only if Shiro was causing a problem.

Of course. I was a fucking idiot. Shiro probably caused this. Ichigo most likely tried to stop him from doing anything so he lit the incense, and then fell and hit his head on the table.

Maybe.

I didn't fucking know.

Either way, he was pretty gone, and that cut was nothing to laugh at either. Shitty thing was, I didn't have the slightest clue on what to do about it. Getting him off of the floor might be the first thing to do, though. Getting him up onto the couch wasn't too difficult – he was freakishly lightweight for a kid in his late teens. It worried me for some reason, but not as much as the blood caking his forehead. I had no idea how to fix it, but luckily I knew someone who could.

Calling Szayel for something this small would absolutely piss him off. But the pink-haired bastard owed me so many things.

He answered on the second ring, sounding irritated.  _"What do you want, Grimmjow?"_

All I could do was laugh shortly and sit on the arm of the couch. "Nice to hear you too, Szayel. It's been, what, almost a year now?"

His aggravated groan made me snicker, but I kept it quiet, or else he wouldn't help me.  _"Cut to the chase, Grimm. I'm busy right now."_

I just rolled my eyes. "Yeah, whatever. I need to borrow you and your beautiful doctoring skills for a bit. There's a small problem I need taken care of." I managed a sideways glance at Ichigo's unconscious form before a harsh laugh had me gritting my teeth.

"What is it this time? Another one of your boy-toys run out on ya again and leave you hard and miserable?"

Jesus, I was gonna  _kill_  this prick.

Thankfully, I managed to get a hold of my temper before I exploded on him and he never talked to me again. "Not in the least bit. There's this kid I got with me. He's hurt and I dunno shit about fixing people up."

I swear to God, that man giggled.  _"Oh? So it_ _ **is**_ _a toy then!~ You must have some guts, going after a kid. Or just really desperate for a lay."_

The images of Ichigo that popped into my head almost made me gag. "The fuck? No! Christ, I'd never fuck him. He's Urahara's bro's kid. The crazy guy asked me to look after him for a while, and he did… Something to get himself a bloodied forehead and sent off to Lala Land."

Szayel's enthusiasm when he replied almost surprised me.  _"He has a head wound? Why the hell didn't you say so in the first place! Get it cleaned and try to wake him up, I'm on my way over."_  The line went dead.

Well, that solved my problem. I tossed the phone onto the coffee table and went into the kitchen, grabbing a clean cloth and a bowl of warm water – just like the first night I saw him. Walking back into the living room, I saw Pantera licking at the scratches she'd made on his arms, purring softly as she did. It was cute and made me smile slightly, but it vanished when I felt how cold Ichigo's skin was. He still had a pulse, thankfully. It was slow but steady; better than nothing.

I didn't plan on sitting on the floor, so I moved the table closer and sat on the edge while trying to be gentle about cleaning the blood away. There wasn't much, and the wound didn't look too bad. But from hanging around Pinky all the time, he'd drilled into my brain that any kind of head wound, no matter how small, could be extremely dangerous. I believed him, too. He may have been a flamboyant gay asshole, but he was the best kind of doctor I'd ever encountered, and the freakiest scientist ever in existence.

When Szayel showed up he just burst in, not even bothering to announce himself. He practically pushed me out of the way to get to Ichigo's head, almost making me break the incense burner. We didn't speak until he was done with the initial inspection.

"You should be lucky, Grimmjow," he said in his 'gravely serious' voice that always made me laugh. Though for some reason, it didn't this time. "It's not as bad as it could be. He hit the edge of the table instead of a corner, which probably saved his life. But he shouldn't be unconscious from something as simple as that…" He trailed off, frowning and adjusting his glasses. I was completely confused though.

"Whadaya mean?"

Szayel's gaze didn't waver away from Ichigo in the slightest. "He didn't hit hard enough, and the cut itself wasn't very deep. So he must've been relatively close to the table to begin with. There shouldn't have been much blood, so the possibility of blood loss is out of the question." He paused and looked up at me. "The most he should've felt from that is minor dizziness and headache. Why he lost consciousness is completely baffling."

He inhaled deeply, like he always did when he was stumped, but froze, his eyes growing wide. He started looking around frantically, like he was looking for something. "Do you smell that?"

I arched an eyebrow in his direction and shook my head. Pantera jumped into my lap and I scratched her head. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

He ignored me – big surprise – and stood from the table, eyes searching around the room until they landed on something behind me. He pointed and lunged forward. "That!"

I turned, only seeing the incense box sitting next to the holder. Szayel reached down and grabbed it, then held it up to his nose and sniffed. I thought he was a fucking idiot, but his eyes widened and he stared at me.

"Where did you get this?" As if I couldn't see it, he waved the box in front of my face. I glared at him and shoved it away.

"I didn't. Ichigo brought it with him. Said somethin' about Hat-n-Clogs saying it'd calm down Shiro if he went all crazy again."

Pinky's expression went from just staring at me blankly to looking confused. "Who's Shiro?"

Pantera growled softly at the name and stared at Ichigo. Szayel followed her gaze and frowned, then pointed at Ichigo and looked back at me. "That's Shiro?"

I almost shuddered. "Fuck, if it were I sure as hell wouldn't be babysitting an insane psychopath who would probably constantly try to get in my pants. No, that's Ichigo. Urahara said he had a second personality named Shiro that… Protects him or something. Fuck if I know." I glanced over at Szayel, wondering what he was getting at. "Why?"

He frowned and looked between the kid on my couch and the box in his hand, then slowly directed his gaze at me. "Grimm, you said this calms him down, correct?" I nodded and Szayel's frown grew deeper. "This type of incense is used during exorcisms of demons and evil spirits. It's supposed to calm them down and make it easier for the exorcist to get the demon out of whomever or whatever it's possessing."

That time it was my turn to frown. "What?"

Szayel's eye twitched and he sighed. "Grimmjow, what exactly happens when this… 'Shiro' comes out?"

This conversation was  _not_  going in a direction I was very fond of. I didn't even believe in this shit in the first place. But I figured there was no harm in answering his question. "Ichi's eyes kinda start to go blank and this… Black stuff spreads out over them, starting from the corners until they look completely different." I suppressed a shudder at the thought of those gold-and-black  _things_  staring at me like I was a meal.

Pinky nodded. I didn't even notice that he'd pulled out a notebook and started frantically writing things down. "Define 'completely different'."

I didn't wanna answer. "Gold irises. The whites of his eyes turn black. And he gets this really fucking creepy grin on his face; like he's gonna kill ya or something." Or rape every living thing in sight. Maybe skin things alive or torture them. Whichever way it went, that grin was like Death saying he was on his way to end your life in the most horrible way possible.

In my lap, Pantera meowed and jumped onto the couch, walking up Ichigo's torso and stopping on his chest. She laid down almost daintily, tucking her paws underneath her and staring at the kid's face. She licked his chin a few times, then rubbed her head up against him, then just stared again. It was almost motherly.

Beside me, Szayel was still scribbling things down. He looked up at Pantera when he was done and cocked his head to the side, as if intrigued by something. The expression on his face made it seem like his mind was far away, which really wasn't all that surprising. I barely heard him mumbling to himself – something about cats and demons and hissing. I couldn't tell exactly.

When he leaned closer to Ichigo's face, I glared. There wasn't much visibility through his obnoxiously pink hair, though I could barely make out him lifting the kid's eyelid. Then he pulled away. "Well, that might explain why…"

Once again, talking to himself. I couldn't take the suspense – if there was any. I reached out and tried to grab that stupid little notebook, but he practically skipped out of my reach. He slammed it shut and slid the pen through its spiral binding.

"That cut shouldn't need anything more than a few bandages," he mumbled while digging through his bag. He pulled out a white roll of stuff and threw it at me. "Use that. Change it twice a day, clean it, and he'll be fine."

I didn't even know what the hell to say. But I did have one question.

"What the fuck is Shiro if he's not a second personality?"

Szayel looked at me like I was the stupidest man alive, which wasn't exactly a lie. I did have more brawn than brain, I admit. But I wasn't a moron. Although, what he said next made me rethink that last part.

"My theory is that Shiro is a demon, hidden deep within Ichigo's mind. Why he's there, I have no idea."

I stared down at Ichigo, not really feeling any kind of emotion towards what I'd just heard or thinking anything. Other than one thing.

"Motherfucker."


	7. We're Damned After All

(Ichigo POV)

_It was dark, cold, and lonely. Nothing could be seen, or heard, or even felt. The frigid air was virtually the only thing my mind could register. Along with the mysterious need to do something – but what it was I had no idea._

_Everything was racing around in my head, making me feel dizzy and disoriented. I couldn't understand what was happening; I started running blindly in a random direction. My feet caught on nothing and I fell to a seemingly nonexistent floor – hard, smooth, and even colder than the air. My arms hit first, then my chest, legs, and head in rapid succession. I didn't dare move, suddenly scared out of my mind at something unknown. It was only moments later that my oxygen supply was cut off and I was choking on nothing. I flailed and tried to move away. My hands came in contact with something . The second they did, an image flooded my vision._

_I wished immediately that I was blind again._

_There was a giant man hovering over me, looking downright murderous. His entire body was a bright red with bulging muscles and lethal-looking fangs. Out of my periphery, all I could see was an orange-red haze and a few disoriented figures, all seemingly dressed in black._

_My lungs burned and things in front of me were blurring drastically. The monster above me suddenly looked shocked, his eyes going wide before the hold on my throat was released. Air had never tasted so good before, and I couldn't get enough. I rolled over onto my side, trying to cough and breathe at the same time. Around me, I heard curious mumbling as my vision evened back out. I stared hard at my arm, forcing myself to hold back an unmanly scream when I realized that the arm wasn't mine. It was white – like freshly fallen snow or rice._

The next thing I know I'm sitting up so fast the world started to spin and a wave of nausea hit me so hard I almost fall over. My mind was still half stuck in that other world – I could hardly make out my surroundings. But I'd eventually calmed down enough to realize that I was in the spare bedroom of Grimmjow's house. I knew for a fact that I hadn't fallen asleep there, but my memory seemed like it had holes in it. The most I had to go off of was the fact that my head was pounding along with my heartbeat. Possibly a migraine, but that wasn't likely – I could still see and think straight.

The faint sound of voices was what made me stand from the bed and walk towards the door, almost falling a few times because of the fucking dizziness that still made everything tilt on its side.

Thankfully, the door wasn't closed completely so all I had to do was press on it and step out into the hallway, then stand directly in the doorframe so I couldn't be seen. I recognized Grimmjow's voice, but not the second, though it sounded almost feminine.

"I don't want to do anything serious, Grimm. I just want to run a few tests on him, that's all." The stranger sounded as if he were begging. As if Grimmjow would give into that.

I heard him sigh; a frustrated sound. "Bullshit, Szayel. You'd chop him up into little fucking pieces if you got the change."

I automatically wondered who he was talking about, but something told me that I already knew.

"I would not!" the stranger shouted, sounding appalled. "Mayuri is the one who does all that shit, not me! I would never even dream of doing that to a patient."

Grimmjow scoffed, sounding close to being pissed. "Whatever. I'm still not letting you do it, no matter how much you want to."

Once again, the mystery person was brought up. Szayel – assumed the stranger's name to be – seemed to whine. "But don't you wanna know what's going on with the kid? There's no way 'Shiro' is  _only_  a second personality. Maybe Ichigo doesn't even know about him."

I barely had time to bite down on my lip to keep from making any noise. It  _was_  me that they were talking about, along with the demon stuck inside me. When I finally realized that, Shiro – for the first time since I'd woke up – reacted accordingly, though he probably thought it to be perfectly reasonable. His rage was so extreme that everything blurred and I found myself with one knee on the floor. He didn't say anything, though I could tell that he wanted to. Out in the living room, their conversation continued on.

"Ichigo is fully aware of what's going on, Szayel," Grimmjow near snarled, which was surprising because I didn't think that he would have ever cared about me enough to stand up for me. "If he wants you to do experiments or whatever the fuck you have planned, then go ahead. But  _only_  if he lets you." So maybe he didn't care about me all that much. But at least he stood up for me.

A somewhat childish giggle of glee echoed around the house. "Oh, I hope so. He'd be so much fun to examine. So many unanswered questions and mysteries just begging to be revealed. And if 'Shiro' really  _is_  a demon, maybe I'll just do the kid a favour and get rid of the hellish bastard for him."

Shiro snapped and – once again – everything blurred. I could barely feel my hands slamming harshly against the floor. It was hard to hear the sound of footsteps rushing toward me over Shiro's rage, but I could feel the thuds through the floor.

' _ **Wha the fuck does tha' bastard think he is? Does he really think tha' he could juss get rid 'a me?'**_

I could barely hear Grimmjow's voice in my ear, though I felt his hands grabbing my shoulders in an iron grip. He kept shaking me and I could only imagine how dazed and stupid I looked. Or maybe it was an 'I'm-in-serious-pain' look. Either way I probably looked really fucking stupid.

Grimmjow was the first one to speak.

"What the fuck was that? You should be in bed, damnit."

I glared up at him, immediately feeling irritated and crabby – most likely a side effect from Shiro's emotions. " _I_  should be in  _bed? You_  should be  _protecting_  me. That's what you were hired for, anyways – as protection from myself and people like him." I pointed over at whom I assumed to be Szayel, sneering at him. Then a thought popped into my head and I suddenly felt the urge to be sarcastic. "Oh wait! You only care about the  _money._ You could care less about what happens to me, am I right?"

Grimmjow's expression was priceless – both shocked and angry at the same time. It was almost as if he  _hadn't_  expected me to catch on, and was pissed that I did. But he didn't say anything, so instead I turned my attention over to the only other one in the area, who had bright pink hair and girly glasses that I wanted to smack off of his barely-smirking face.

"And you! What the  _fuck_  makes you think I'll let you do  _anything_  to me? What makes you think that you have the right to talk about me like I'm just one of your fucking experiments?"

By then my face was probably bright red, but that was honestly the last thing on my mind. Shiro's anger was taking over me – only his anger. It wasn't Shiro himself – just his emotions. Somewhere in the back of my mind I thought it was strange, but the thought was shoved away almost as soon as it had occurred.

Grimmjow's expression turned worried, though Szayel looked fucking ecstatic. He had this little notebook in his hand and was frantically scribbling down something in it. The grin on his face was enough to send me over the edge. Shiro's rage was just as much mine. For once, we were virtually the same person.

My hand flashed out and grabbed the notebook, then threw it back in his face. For a moment, everything flashed back to the dream I'd had, and Szayel was the red creature pinning me down. It was like two light switches had been flicked on at the same time. My anger melted away into confusion and unexplained fear, while Shiro felt downright terrified. Then within seconds his fear was gone and replaced with pure loathing. I felt my control slipping, and I knew that there were only a few moments until Shiro would come out.

Grimmjow was kneeling next to me, and I barely had time to shove him away before Shiro lunged at Szayel. I couldn't stop him – couldn't do jack shit. The bastard had locked me up tight, in one of the far corners of my mind where he wouldn't hear my cries, no matter how loudly I screamed.

~*~o~*~o~*~o~*~

(Shiro POV)

This fucker was gonna die.

He wanted to do shit to Ichi, but I wasn't gonna let him. I was gonna rip off his stupid pink-haired head and feed it to the most evil creatures in the deepest depths of Hell. He wouldn't hurt Ichi, and I wouldn't get punished for losing another host before the deal was carried out.

So as my hands were wrapped around his throat, I couldn't help but laugh at his terrified face. I didn't know what the fuck Grimmjow was doing, nor did I even really care. My attention was focused on my prey and his writhing body, his helpless expression of terror, the strangled cries that escaped his lips. I felt my heartbeat speed up with what I assumed to be adrenalin. It must have been – even in Ichigo's weak body, it felt as if I could do anything.

Szayel's hands gripped my arms and I just laughed at his pathetic attempts to throw me off.

" **Ya really think ya can get rid 'a me?"** I hissed, leaning in close to his face and grinning.  **"'Cause I got news fer ya –** _ **nothin'**_ **ya can do will work."**

It was amusing – seeing him visibly shudder. His mind and body certainly knew when to give up. But with one look into his eyes, I could practically see the defiance dancing around in those disgusting, gold irises. He thought he could beat me, and that he could take Ichigo and do whatever he wanted to the kid. But nothing was gonna happen to Ichi – not if I could help it.

I didn't see Grimmjow until it was too late. If I hadn't been stuck in Ichigo's body I would've been able to avoid that blue-haired Adonis and the syringe in his hand. Probably stole it from that bastard Szayel's bag. Either way, he ran at me and shoved it into my shoulder before I even got a chance to get away. I felt the effects almost immediately. It was like every muscle in my body just stopped working, and even after realizing that I was stupid enough to try attempting a punch at Grimmjow's face. I ended up falling face first into his arms, then just going limp.

My vision was gone by then, and the last thing I heard was the fuckhead scientist yelling something at Grimmjow – something about Ichi.


	8. I Want Your Chokehold

(Grimmjow POV)

Something was definitely wrong with Ichigo. And there was no way in  _hell_  that Shiro was just another personality – not after what'd happened.

After I got the bastard with that sedative Szayel flipped a shit. I swear, his head was gonna explode from how pissed he was. Ranted on about how dangerous shoving an entire syringe of meds into Ichi's body was and how quickly we needed to act in order to get Shiro out of the kid and how I should've been faster because he could have died. I was only seconds away from punching the pink-haired bastard in the fucking face. Would've done it too, had he not scampered off into the living room. I didn't bother following, instead reclining back against the wall.

I hadn't let go of Ichigo after he practically collapsed onto me, and I honestly didn't  _want_  to let go. Szayel was rambling on about how he wanted to take Ichigo back to his lab and pry Shiro from his brain. Like hell I'd let the creepy motherfucker do that. Neither of us really even know  _what_  Shiro was anyways. All we had were theories, and that wasn't enough for me. If Szayel wanted to experiment on Ichigo, he'd have to pry the kid from my cold dead hands.

I needed to talk to somebody who knew what was going on. Ichigo was unconscious, so he was automatically out. Szayel didn't know what the fuck he was talking about. There wasn't anybody else I knew who would understand what was happening either. Then I realized that Urahara should know what was happening better than any of us.

It was difficult getting my phone out of my pocket with an unconscious teenager on my lap, but I managed and punched in Hat-n-Clogs' number, then waited for him to pick up. After the third ring the call went through.

" _Urahara Store, how may we be of service?"_

I rolled my eyes, irritated at Kisuke's assistant and his constant need for formalities. "Fuck off, Tessai. Where's Urahara?"

I heard a soft grunt and could clearly picture Tessai glaring into the phone.  _"He's busy and cannot come to the phone. May I take a message?"_

"The hell you can! I don't give a rat's ass if he's busy or not. This is important! It's about his nephew, Ichigo. Now get him on the fucking phone!" I felt Szayel's eyes boring holes into my skull from where he stood in the living room, but just shoved it off. I'd deal with him later.

Tessai mumbled something I didn't hear and the line went silent, so I assumed he was getting Hat-n-Clogs. It only took a few minutes, but in that short span of time I'd moved Ichigo further into my lap and – for some freakish reason unknown to me – started running my hand through his hair.

I almost jumped when Kisuke's voice echoed through my head.  _"Grimmy-kitty!~ How's my beautiful darling nephew doing?~"_

Again, I rolled my eyes. Everything in my mind screamed at me to be a total smartass, but that wouldn't help with the problem at hand. "It's Shiro. What the fuck is he?"

The line was silent for what felt like a really long time before Urahara spoke, his voice sounding low and deadly serious.  _"What happened?"_ I relayed everything that'd happened to the shopkeeper, hardly even noticing when Pantera strode over to me and started rubbing her head up against my elbow. There was another silence.  _"First off, get Szayel out of there. I don't want him doing anything potentially harmful to Ichigo."_ The scientist seemed to hear this and looked appalled, but I glared at him before he could say anything.  _"I'll be over as soon as I can. Make_ sure _that pink-haired bastard isn't there."_ The line went dead and I ended the call.

I didn't even need to look to know that Szayel was pissed. But when I did turn my gaze to him, his arms were crossed over his chest, making him look like a goddamn diva.

"I'm not leaving!" he pouted, slumping against the wall like a child would. "I wanna know what's going on with the kid too!"

I couldn't hold back an irritated sigh and clenched my fist in an attempt to control my anger. "I don' give a fuck if you wanna know what's happening. You've done what you were called here to do, now get the hell off of my property!" Beside me, Pantera hissed and I couldn't help but smirk.

Szayel, however, sneered in my direction and grabbed his bag before storming out of the house, slamming the door shut behind him. The force of the impact made the walls shake. Ichigo twitched in my arms and started whimpering pathetically, his hands grabbing fistfuls of my shirt. I had no idea what was going on with him, but when I touched his cheek he seemed to calm down. The whimpers evened off into the breath rate that came with being in a deep sleep and his face looked more relaxed. I guessed it was a good thing, but still made a mental note to ask Urahara about it when he got here.

Which ended up being nearly half an hour later. He barged into the house the same way Szayel did – without even a knock as a warning. I was still sitting in the hallway with Ichigo – I didn't want to move anywhere, because Shiro might've woken up if I moved the kid, despite the fact that the carrot-top was out cold. The way Kisuke was eyeballing him made me nervous. It was almost the exact same way Pinkie looked at him – like Ichi was an experiment or something. The only difference was that Urahara at least showed some kind of love to the kid.

When he knelt down next to me, it was a huge surprise when he took off his hat – something he  _never_  did of his own free will. He didn't touch Ichigo in any way that didn't appear threatening, and his gaze was considerably kinder than Szayel's. I could practically see the wheels in Hat-n-Clogs' head turning as he examined Ichigo's face closer. Beside me, Pantera hissed when he reached forward and pulled one of the kid's eyelids up. Still that same chocolate brown; just slightly more dull.

It was a few more minutes before Urahara was done looking Ichigo over, and by then my legs were starting to fall asleep. I almost breathed a sigh of relief when Hat-n-Clogs up and lifted Ichigo into his arms, then carried him out into the living room. Why he didn't put the kid in his bedroom, I'd never understand. Though it was possible he wanted to keep an eye on the poor guy, I wasn't sure if that was the exact reason or not. Never did ask either.

I followed Urahara out into the living room and sat on the coffee table while he took up what little space Ichigo wasn't using. Pantera meowed up at me and jumped into my lap. I hardly even noticed when she started rubbing her head up against arm. My attention was focused so entirely on Ichigo that I'd almost missed Urahara talking.

"He'll sleep for a while, but other than that he should be fine." His voice was quiet and serious, something I wasn't used to. It honestly made me nervous – made me think that the shopkeeper was hiding something. But even if he was, it wouldn't have been very beneficial seeing as how I had to look after the kid. And whether he was hiding anything or not, I still couldn't help but feel relieved at the fact that Ichi was gonna be alright.

"I would like to talk to you about something though," Urahara murmured, so softly I could barely hear him. Usually when a conversation started out like this, I avoided it all together. Shit always ends up getting questioned and it's irritating. But I had a feeling it was about Ichigo, and I was genuinely curious. I wasn't about to let Hat-n-Clogs know that though.

So instead I let Pantera up into my lap and started petting her, smiling slightly when she started licking my hand. "About what?"

He seemed to almost shrug, as if the topic was lighthearted. "Just the job and whatnot, nothing too big."

Already I could tell this was a conversation I didn't want to have. But I didn't want to let Urahara know that, so instead of leaving the room like I wanted, I just shrugged and moved to scratch the area behind Pantera's ears. "'Kay. What 'bout it?"

"How do you feel about Ichigo?"

The question was admittedly a bit surprising, and whether or not my face showed it I didn't know. "Dunno. Only really known 'im for a few days. He's a nice kid though, I'll give him that."

The smile that crept across Urahara's face scared me. It was like his wildest theories had come true or something. In all honesty, it was really weird.

"You know… You certainly were holding Ichigo rather possessively when I got here," Urahara mumbled, moving to brush some of the hair out of the kid's face. I caught the shopkeeper's wrist right before he touched Ichigo, Pantera hissing at him from my lap. He kept a blank expression for a few seconds, then a smile slowly grew on his face. "I knew it…"

I had no idea what he was talking about and I honestly thought for a moment that I'd just be better off knowing. But Urahara wouldn't waste his breath saying something that didn't need to be heard. I glared slightly. "Knew what?"

"Oh, so you're oblivious to your own emotions and actions?" The blonde looked back down towards Ichigo, a pathetically sad look on his face. "Tell me, why did you accept this job in the first place?" He looked up towards me, his expression smug. "It was the money, wasn't it?"

I really didn't like where the conversation was going, and Pantera seemed to notice my discomfort, rubbing her head up against my arm and meowing loudly. I didn't do anything, too focused on Urahara to really pay attention to her. "What the hell are you talking about? Why are you even asking me this? Of course it was for the money, asshole."

For a moment I thought I'd said something wrong, as Urahara's face turned sad and he stared down at Ichigo while frowning deeply. "I see then… You deny your own feelings, I take it."

I shook my head, really having no idea what the hell he's talking about. "What feelings? What in God's name are you rambling on about, old man?" The realization of what Hat-n-Clogs was talking about hit me rather suddenly, almost like a random slap in the face. I felt like an idiot for not realizing what it was before. Urahara seemed to notice that I understood what he was talking about and smirked.

"See now? You realize that you have feelings for Ichigo." His smirk only seemed to grow. "You deny it, don't you? It wouldn't be surprising if you did."

This conversation was quickly wearing my patience out and I clenched my hands into fists in an attempt to try calming down. It didn't work.

"I don't have feelings for the kid," I sneered, refusing to look at Urahara or Ichigo. "I'm only doing this for the money, nothing more. The only thing I feel towards him is irritation for having to be his fucking guard dog night and day."

One look at Urahara's face, and I knew I said something wrong. Leave it to me to open up my mouth and start spewing out bullshit. I only felt bad for a second – just one measly little second – then stood and walked into the kitchen. For some reason I suddenly felt  _really_  thirsty, almost as if I could drink an entire gallon of water and still want more. Or maybe a gallon of vodka. That was always good too. The bags from this morning's grocery store adventure were still sitting on the table, only the cold things having been put away. Thankfully, that included the alcohol I'd bought. It tasted like shit when it was warm, no matter what kind of drink it was.

I grabbed the half-empty bottle of vanilla rum and started drinking straight from it. Hat-n-Clogs wouldn't be pleased, but I couldn't give a flying fuck about what he thought. The bastard thought I was in love with  _Ichigo_ , of all people. Why I would be in love with a more-than-likely-possessed boy in his late teens was beyond me. It wasn't even fathomable, let alone possible. But the more I thought about it, the more sense it make.

Urahara had a point when he said I'd been holding Ichigo rather possessively earlier. It was completely true, but that didn't mean I had fucking  _feelings_ for the brat. Even if I  _did_  love Ichigo, I wouldn't be denying it – I'm more of a man than that.

No, I definitely did  _not_  love Ichigo, and that was that.


	9. Nothing Worse Than Knowing How It Ends

(Ichigo POV)

"Grimmjow,  _enough_. I don't wanna talk about it here."

"Then where? 'Cause ya won't talk about it at home."

I groaned, letting my fingers find their way to my temples and start rubbing them. Grimmjow currently sat across from me in a somewhat secluded booth at this local breakfast diner he knew about, drilling me about Shiro and what he really was. Because apparently 'I don't know' isn't an acceptable answer for him. It was like the bastard knew I was lying. Or fucking Urahara told him something, and that was why he was being nosey. Either way, I didn't want to talk about it; period. But Grimm didn't seem to care.

He leaned up against the table from his previous position reclining against the back of the seat. "Look, I know for a fucking  _fact_  Shiro is more than a second personality. I've been around people like that a lot. Shit like that doesn't happen with another half."

He must've been referring to the previous night, where I hazily remembered Shiro trying to kill Grimmjow's pink-haired scientist friend. The one who wanted to _experiment_  on me because I was apparently "possessed" by a demon. First off, Shiro wasn't exactly a demon. Secondly, I wasn't being possessed, I was just being a host. Huge difference people didn't seem to understand.

"I'm just worried about you, is all."

My head shot up, hands dropping away from the sides of my face. Grimmjow was worried about  _me_? It was unheard of. The clear look of surprise on my face must've made him notice what he'd said, and he immediately tried to cover it up.

"Because, ya know… If something happened to you I wouldn't get paid, and shit…" His gaze was directed away from me, which just made me smirk. In the back of my mind I could hear Shiro cackling triumphantly.

' _ **Nice one, Ichi! The kitty's speechless!'**_

Unfortunately for both Shiro and I, our victory was short lived, Grimmjow recovering from his slip-up freakishly fast and bombarding me with more demands.

"Out with it, Ichigo," he hissed. He was trying to control his anger, but it didn't seem to be working very well. "What the fuck is Shiro? And why the hell is he with you?"

' _ **Persistent, 'aint 'e?'**_ Shiro said quietly, his words echoing through my mind. I almost nodded along with him, catching myself at the last second.  _ **'Might as well tell 'im, 'fore 'e finds out 'imself and flips a shit.'**_ That time I did nod, and Grimmjow smirked victoriously.

I took in a deep breath.

"Shiro isn't a second personality, but he's not a demon either." The look of satisfaction on Grimmjow's face turned to slight confusion, which almost made me laugh. "His kind isn't really dangerous. He won't tell me exactly what their purpose is, but they make deals with people and stick around in their minds until it's fulfilled. Then they just leave. Supposedly they feed off of strong human emotions, like love and anger and whatnot." I shrugged and looked up as a waitress stopped at our table, setting down the huge plate of food Grimmjow ordered and my milkshake. The food went unnoticed and I sipped from my milkshake as Grimm stared at me.

"That told me close to nothing," he muttered, rubbing his forehead. I glared but didn't say anything. "How'd ya get introduced to Shiro?"

I backed away from my milkshake reluctantly, stirring in the whipped cream with the straw. "It was around six months ago. I had to watch all of my friends around me be in happy relationships with each other. I was the only one I knew who preferred guys to girls, so I was left out of the whole relationship circle. I got jealous and angry at them after a while, and just wanted to find somebody of my own. It's hard to remember what exactly made Shiro come to me, but he did, and offered to find someone for me if I offered something to him in exchange. He wouldn't say what he wanted, but I agreed almost immediately." I stopped and took a big gulp of milkshake, looking quickly up at Grimmjow and seeing that he seemed thoroughly entertained, mindlessly munching on a french fry.

"About a month or so later, I started blacking out for long periods of time, then waking up covered in blood. I tried freaking out, going to the authorities, everything. Shiro wouldn't let me; said it was how he survived. I still don't understand why he likes the taste of fear and desperation when he kill somebody, but nothing's stopped him so far." A thought occurred to me, and I laughed, making Grimm raise a light blue eyebrow in my direction. "Shiro's kinda flipped my life upside down, in more ways than one…"

I honestly couldn't help brooding over that fact. I'd gotten arrested more than once on account of him, but he'd broken me out every time. Why the police were stupid and didn't put me in a more high security cell each time, I'd never understand. But in a way, he ruined my life, though the thought of Shiro doing something that harsh made me feel horrible.

Shiro was hurt by the thought too, I could tell that much. I was going to try making things better between us, but I felt Grimmjow's hand on mine and I looked up at him. The expression on his face made me a little worried, since he never outwardly showed any kind of sign as to caring about me.

"I'll get rid of him," he said sternly, his cerulean eyes hard and steely – the look of a man in all seriousness. "I swear I'll make him leave you alone."

For a second I couldn't see anything, but I could feel Shiro's rage and – surprisingly – his fear. I felt Grimmjow's grip tighten and I could've sworn I heard him growling, but a second later everything was fine. I could see again and Shiro couldn't be felt. The latter made me worry, seeing as how whenever he disappeared bad things usually happened. Grimmjow seemed to sigh in relief and let go of my hand. I didn't get the time to give him a weird look, since he called the waitress over and asked for the check. We weren't even done eating.

He didn't even look at the bill – just handed the waitress a random amount of money and stood to leave. I couldn't do anything other than follow him out the door and into the streets. We didn't really say much, other than little comments here and there. Something about the weather or an interesting shop we passed. I wasn't really concerned about the lack of conversation. It was to be expected, after having explained everything about Shiro and myself, though Grimmjow's last comment made me feel rather uneasy.

I was wondering how Grimm was going to try getting rid of Shiro when he suddenly stopped in front of an eerie-looking shop with a sign in the window blatantly advertising the performance of exorcisms for a relatively small price. There was a little blonde freckled girl with her hair up in pigtails sitting in front of the shop who saw Grimmjow staring, and she moved to supposedly talk to him. I tried getting the man to move but he just stood there, the stubborn bastard.

"Hey, you! Ya interested in an exorcism?"

Her voice was freakishly annoying, but Grimmjow hardly seemed to care. He just grinned and looked down at the little blonde brat. "Maybe. Depends on if it actually works or not."

She imitated his grin and motioned for him to follow her inside. I pulled on his arm, thankfully getting his attention. "Grimm, I don't think this is a good idea… Shiro might get upset…"

The look of amusement on his face surprised me, to say the least. It was like he didn't believe me. "I don' give a fuck what that bastard thinks. I want him gone."

Shiro seemed to shrink back into my mind underneath Grimmjow's stare, something I wasn't fond of. It made me worried. "I don't care if you want him gone," I hissed, pulling on his arm more. "Something bad could happen. Haven't you seen the exorcist movies? Shiro could go batshit crazy! Even more so than usual!"

Grimmjow didn't even seem to care in the slightest. He just rolled his eyes and pulled his arm out of my grip, walking into the store. I actually thought about just leaving, but I stupidly followed anyways. The uneasy feeling grew the further I walked into the store, Shiro growing more and more anxious as the seconds ticked by. It was most definitely a weird store, filled with dark magic-looking items, crucifixes, and a shit-ton of other freakishly creepy things. A mummified head made me focus my eyes on the blood-red floor, which – in turn – made me run into Grimmjow as he stopped in a doorway covered by heavy black drapes. He hardly even seemed to notice, walking right through them like they were nothing. I hesitated.

' _ **Hey Ichi… We should get outta 'ere… This place is givin' me th' creeps.'**_

I nodded along with Shiro's statement, starting to back out towards the door to the shop, only to have the blonde pigtailed girl come out from fucking nowhere and push me into the room after Grimmjow. It was dimly lit and took a second for my eyes to adjust but when they did, a noticeable shiver went down my spine and Shiro hissed.

There were more crucifixes back here than there were up front, candles everywhere with a circle of them in the center of the room. Grimmjow stood off to the side and a creepy-looking man that closely resembled a fox sat on a really big pillow on the floor. He had the creepiest grin on his face and his eyes were just little slits, and not to mention his hair. It rivaled the craziness of mine and Grimmjow's, being so silver it very clearly reflected the candlelight. He motioned to the center of the circle.

"Whoever's infused with th' demon mus' sit in the circle." His voice was smooth, almost commanding, and strangely calm. I almost couldn't control myself, walking into the circle despite the fact Shiro was freaking the fuck out and that I  _really_  didn't want to do it. I saw Grimmjow sit in a chair off to the side, his shoulders rigid and his posture stiff, as if he himself wasn't even sure of what might happen. The fox man stood, smiled even wider, and bowed almost politely.

"My name's Gin," he said smoothly, coming up from the bow. "I'll be performin' the exorcism taday. If it's successful, then I get paid. If not, then I dun get paid. But if ya interrupt, then ya pay half."

I saw Grimmjow shrug in my periphery. "Sounds fair enough."

Gin's smirk grew and he looked down at me, then pulled something out of his pocket. It was a vial of something that looked like water, but judging from Shiro's pissed reactions it must've been more than just that. I could feel him thrashing around, but – oddly enough – he didn't try to take control. I almost wanted him to, just so I could get away.

"Are ya ready, 'ittle one?"

The nickname pissed me off and I most definitely  _wasn't_ ready, but my head seemed to nod of its own accord. He started muttering something I couldn't understand and it was like my brain was trying to jump out of my skull via my eye sockets. There was a harsh force pressing down on my head from all angles, like the air around me was being compressed or something. It hurt like a bitch, and Shiro flailing around didn't help any. I was barely aware of falling to my hands and knees, too centered in on the freakish pain I was feeling.

A weird smoky scent reached my nose, and at the same time something wet hit my forehead. Everything went dark and Shiro's pained breaths echoed around me. He was trying to hold back from screaming, and I was honestly thankful for it. I didn't think I could handle that much, seeing as how I could feel my sanity slowly slipping away.

My vision came back and with it, a deep breath of the disgusting smoke into my lungs. More of the wet feeling hit my face, Shiro ramming into the barrier between us. It felt almost like a railroad spike being driven through both of my temples, and I collapsed onto my elbows and cradled my head in my hands. Gin's mumbling got louder and more furious. The blue of Grimmjow's hair seeped into my blurry vision, which kept blinking out then returning a few seconds later.

I was surprised I wasn't screaming yet. Shiro was close to, trying to hold them in as best he could. My vision went out again, fingers threading into my hair and pulling. I didn't feel anything.

" **K-King… Make it st-stoooppp…"**

Colour was back again and it took a second to realize that Shiro had spoken out loud. Gin's chanting got more desperate, really making Shiro scream. Something reminiscent of a whimper or a whine worked its way into the gasps of air I was trying to take in. Grimmjow's voice barely reached my ears and Gin was interrupted. The pain lessened almost immediately to a dull throb and before I even really knew what was happening I felt myself being lifted from the floor and carried somewhere.

The scent of smoke disappeared. I faintly heard Grimmjow saying something, then he was moving and fresh air assaulted my nose. My head was clearing up freakishly fast but I couldn't see very clearly; everything seemed to be blotted out. I pushed against Grimmjow's chest, trying to get him to put me down. But once he did the world started spinning at an alarming rate and the worst sort of nausea washed over me. I was thankful when he picked me up again and started walking – probably to his home.

Shiro was awfully quiet, hiding somewhere in the back of my mind. I couldn't even feel him, wherever he was.

' _Shiro…?'_ I was almost afraid to call out to him, but I at least wanted to know if he was okay.  _'Shiro, answer me, please.'_

He sighed and came forward a little, only enough as to where I could just barely feel him, hovering on the edges of my consciousness.  _ **'Don't let him do that again, Ichi… 'Else both of us might not make it…'**_ The way he spoke, without the lisp in his voice and the fact that his tone was dead-fucking serious – it almost worried me. Shiro may have been a devious raving son of a bitch, but he had his moments where it would be in everybody's best interest to listen to him. Now would be one of those times.

' _It won't happen again, unless he wants to loose reproductive capabilities...'_

Shiro chuckled at the comment and disappeared again, my vision – for some reason – disappearing along with him. Suddenly feeling a hell of a lot more helpless, I clung to Grimmjow's shirt and pressed my face into his chest, hoping for some form of comfort. His grip tightened, bringing a small smile to my lips. He said he didn't care about me, but this moment made me doubt his accusation even more than I already did.

Grimmjow may have appeared to be a cold-hearted, intimidating  _thing_ , but I had a feeling that he was just a big furry kitten somewhere inside.


	10. Give Me Your Attention

(Grimmjow POV)

Ichigo was practically asleep when I finally was able to haul his ass into the house and onto the couch. Whether he actually was asleep or not, I didn't care to find out. The second he hit the couch I was  
making my way into the kitchen, Pantera following closely behind. She jumped up onto the counter top and walked beside me, meowing before batting her little paw out at my arm. She looked over at the refrigerator and meowed again, then looked back at me.

"What? Are ya hungry? Huh?"

I couldn't help but smile as she leaned her head into my hand and started purring. Sometimes I wondered if she were really the only soul who even slightly gave a fuck about me. It certainly wouldn't surprise me - not in the least bit.

I reached into the fridge and pulled out some fish that I'd made the other night, heating it up slightly in the oven before putting it on a plate and setting it down in front of Pantera. I mumbled a soft "eat up kid" before walking into the living room, a Mike's Hard Lemonade in my hand. Ichigo was still on the couch, only he was sitting up on the middle cushion, cross-legged, and hunched over drastically - almost as if somebody were pushing down on his shoulders.

"Ichigo...?" I didn't want to scare him, but that seemed to happen anyways, the carrot-top jumping when my hand met his arm. Damn kid almost made spill my drink too. But, being the kind-hearted person that I am, I held in my irritation at the kid and pulled his attention to me. "Ichigo, you alright?"

Much to my irritation, he just stared at me with the stupidest look I'd ever seen. It was almost as if his brain had turned to mush after that stupid-ass exorcism. Looking back on it I wasn't even sure why I had made him do it in the first place. When he spoke, he sounded like he would pass out at any given moment.

"I can't feel Shiro..." His voice was soft, and for an immensely brief second, I thought the exorcism had actually worked. But it hasn't even been finished, so it wasn't possible. My thoughts were confirmed when Ichigo spoke up again. "I mean... He isn't gone – I had a conversation with him earlier. But... I just can't feel him anywhere."

I honestly didn't know how to react to that, and the silence stretched out between us. But then Ichigo looked up at me rather suddenly, a look on his face that made think he might have been high. "I want a bath... Can I take a bath?" He didn't even wait for an answer, just stood shakily and clung to the couch, all while trying to make his way to the hall. But when he let go he just fell. It wasn't even a dignified fall – it was just depressing.

It was even more depressing when he tried getting back up. So, with a low sigh, I set my drink down on the table and moved to pick him up bridal-style, then carried him through my own bedroom and into the joint bathroom. I glanced down at him randomly, arching an eyebrow at his shocked expression.

"Why are we in here?" he asked, sounding somewhat panicked.

"Your bathroom doesn't have a tub in it, moron. Wanna take a bath standing up?"

The scared look vanished, replaced by that tired expression yet again. I didn't bother hiding the sneer on my face as I let Ichigo fall unceremoniously onto the counter top next to the sink before reaching down and turning the hot water on. The liquid immediately started filling the huge Jacuzzi tub from five different places. Within no more than ten minutes it was full and I was reaching over to shut the water off. When I turned around, Ichigo was struggling to get his shirt off, his movements extremely uncoordinated. I sighed and moved over to stand in front of the kid.

"Do I have to do everything for you?" It was intended as a rhetorical question, but it was a serious thought. Ichigo blushed and ducked his head, apparently giving up on trying to get his shirt off. It bugged me with how submissive he was being, but I shoved it aside and pulled the kid's shirt off, then worked on his shoes and jeans until he sat there clad in only his boxers.

"There. You can get those off yourself."

Ichigo looked uncomfortable, the blush taking up his whole face, so I did the kind thing and turned around. There was a soft rustling of fabric, then a few sloppy movements and a rather loud splash before I turned around and saw Ichigo nearly completely submerged in the water. His head was the only thing showing, his hair turning a darker orange and fanning out in the water.

I nodded in his direction and turned to leave, only to have a wet hand latch onto my wrist. With a sigh I turned back around and stared at Ichigo. He didn't say anything, but his facial expression sure did. 'Don't leave' is what it said. 'Stay with me.'

I reached up with my free hand, rubbing it over the side of my face in frustration. "Ya really want me to stay?"

A stiff nod was my only answer, and a slightly-stifled sigh was my only reply. The bath looked inviting anyways, so I slipped my shirt off over my head and tossed it to the side. Ichigo's expression was priceless.

"What are you-"

I glared in his direction after slipping my jeans off, effectively cutting off whatever he was going to say. "It's my bath, so I can use it when I want." I stared at him for a moment, trying to read his expression and figure out what he was thinking. "Ya gotta problem with that?"

Ichigo shook his head, moving forward and looking away from me. I couldn't help but smirk at his acting like a little bitch, and the word 'adorable' popped into my head. The smirk vanished. Ichigo wasn't adorable, he was a pain in my fucking ass. But, at least I got a bath. And somebody to wash my back. I could never reach it completely and it drove me crazy.

I slipped out of my boxers and moved into the tub behind Ichigo, holding back a relaxed moan at the feel of the warm water on my back and shoulders. Through half-lidded eyes, I saw Ichigo looking back at me curiously. He almost reminded me of a child, the water easily coming up to the middle of his chest and hiding everything else underneath the water.

"See somethin' ya like?" I smirked, pulling my arms up out of the water and linking my hands together behind my head. I already knew how sexy I looked whenever I did this, knowing full well that most anybody who saw would almost immediately start swooning. Ichigo seemed to be no exception. His face turned bright red before he turned away, back facing me. I just shrugged and leaned back against the wall of the bathtub, bringing my arms up out of the water to rest on the edges on either side of me.

The water felt so nice, I thought I would fall asleep. Hell, I was about to, when Ichigo decided to squish me in between his own body and the wall. He sat in between my legs, back pressing against my chest with his hair sticking into my face and making my nose itch. I almost pushed him away until he mumbled something I couldn't understand and yawned. His head fell to the side, leaning up against my shoulder now, and he hummed softly.

It was all fine for a while. He was leaning up against me, so what? No big deal – I could handle it. At least, I thought I could. The longer I sat in the tub with the amazingly-warm water, the more drowsy I got, which resulted in my hand somehow finding its way into Ichigo's hair. Thank God I caught myself before the kid noticed. But it only got worse. I thought I'd only nodded off for a few seconds, which shouldn't have been enough time for my  _other_  arm to wrap around Ichigo's waist. That time, he  _did_  notice.

"Grimm…? What're ya doing…?" The tiredness was reflected in his voice, and he turned his head so he was staring up at me. He looked so exhausted it was almost depressing. But even despite that, his eyes were still alive, a fire burning deep within those chocolate orbs. I didn't even notice the fact that they looked confused and conflicted – didn't notice anything about everything around me, except for when a barely audible moan echoed around the bathroom.

The first thing I noticed – Ichigo's face was bright fucking red, his eyes were screwed shut, and he was trembling. I had no idea why until his leg moved, taking my hand with it and pulling a gasp from those perfect pink lips. It took me a second to realize that I was gripping his dick. And he was half-hard. Why I didn't realize this earlier, I had no fucking clue. I pulled my hand back like I'd been burned, pushing Ichigo out of my lap and over to the other side of the bathtub. He just stared at me like a lost fucking puppy, with those big brown eyes and the look on his face like he'd done something wrong. It was almost heartbreaking, but I wasn't about to let that get the best of me.

I glared in Ichigo's direction and moved to get out of the water, only to have him latch onto my waist and pull me back down. "Ichigo, what the fuck?"

"Don't leave!" He buried his face into my chest, his blunted nails digging into my arms. I sighed. It was a pathetic attempt at getting me to stay put, but for some reason, it was working. I should've just left anyways, but instead I just sunk back into the water and just  _let_ Ichigo crawl into my lap. His partial erection dug into my thigh, making me bite my lip to keep quiet. There was no way in hell a kid like him would make me moan. His arms slithered around my waist and he pressed his face up against my neck.

I sighed. "Ichigo, what the hell are you doing?"

He didn't say anything for a few minutes, so I just waited. When he finally did speak though, his voice was soft and shaky. "You started it… Aren't ya gonna finish it too?" He looked up, his face only inches from my own. The hazy look in his eyes didn't belong there – shouldn't have been there. His mind was falling away, little by little, undoubtedly being overrun by the pleasure he must've felt from grinding his hips against my leg.

It was awkward, no doubt about that. But I could feel my control slipping, despite how much I tried to hold onto it. It pissed me off, to say the least, but I couldn't fight it for long. He started making these needy whining sounds and moaning, almost mewling. It was damn near unbearable, though I wasn't about to break – especially not for a kid like Ichigo.

But it all fell apart when his lips met mine.


	11. Once I'm In I Own Your Heart

(Grimmjow's POV)

I didn't know why Ichigo was kissing me. I didn't know why I was letting him get away with it; was barely able to even comprehend what was happening. His lips moved against mine, the touch needy but not forceful – almost gentle and curious. I doubted he knew what the hell he was doing, his mind probably even more lost than my own. In fact, I almost wondered if he was even aware of what to do. Judging solely from his inexperienced kiss I would've thought that he was a virgin, which was more than likely the truth. But I wouldn't know until I found out.

If I  _wanted_  to find out, that is.

I actually didn't  _want_  to, as surprising as it sounds. I already told myself I wouldn't sleep with the kid, after all, and I wasn't about to go back on my own damn word.

But it was so  _hard_.

Pun intended.

Both of us wanted it, and Ichigo knew that for a fact. He seemed to smile when he figured out that what he was doing to me, was actually working. The grin got bigger and bigger, until it didn't even seem to be his grin at all – like it belonged to Shiro. His eyes confirmed it, the brown taking on flecks of gold. I didn't get time to figure out if the sadistic demon was going to take over. He lowered his head, obscuring his face with damp orange bangs, and seconds later he was pressing his forehead in the center of my chest – right under my collarbone, I assumed.

He stayed like that for a while, not even moving. I almost thought that he gave up until I felt a pair of lips press up against my throat. They moved around to the area right above my shoulder, then traveled up to my ear. I almost moaned when his teeth sunk into the cartilage, my own sinking into my cheek to keep from making any noise. I may have been letting the kid tease me, but he wasn't gonna win that easily.

"I want you," Ichigo breathed into my ear, making a strong shiver break out and run down my spine. His was the most seductive voice I'd ever heard, something that thoroughly surprised me. His choice of words did so just as much, not that I'd ever outwardly admit it.

"What if  _I_  don't want  _you_?" I shot back, though it wasn't as strong as I wanted it to be. Damn kid was making my brain turn to mush.

Ichigo chuckled, the sound lustful and thoroughly creepy. "Then just pretend I'm not me."

Another shiver appeared when his tongue traced around the edge of my ear, which wasn't entirely unpleasant. If anything it just turned me on even more. The fact that he was pressing his hand into my dick didn't help either – just made it worse. Any more teasing and nothing would be able to stop me from pounding the kid into the wall, floor, or mattress – whatever came first. Preferably the floor, which seemed all the more likely as he kept up his tormenting.

It wasn't very long after when he changed his position, legs on either side of my own with our chests pressed flat together. He was sitting right on my dick, making it both uncomfortable and freakishly pleasurable at the same time, which was somewhat of a surprise. I could feel his full-blown erection pressing up against my lower stomach, though I tried not to think about it. Wasn't very hard to do so, since his lips kept attacking the sides of my neck and whatever else he could reach. My unbreakable control was slipping, all because of one damn kid.

I froze when he brushed up against the one spot I was the weakest – that hollow area between the collarbone and neck.

Just my luck, Ichigo caught on. I heard him laugh almost victoriously before he bit down with apparently everything he could. No doubt it would bruise and hurt like a motherfucker later, but at the moment it didn't seem to matter. Ichigo was suddenly everywhere – was the only thing I could really comprehend. Him, and a burning lust so heated it should've been illegal.

All morals were gone. Our lips attacked each other like there was nothing else left in the world. His nails scratched down my back and arms, my own locked onto his hips and more than likely leaving long, red, angry lines down his thighs. The water sloshed around with the rhythm of hips grinding together, more than likely making a huge mess on the bathroom floor.

Ichigo started moaning, making the sexiest sounds I'd ever heard. His arms came up around my shoulders and pulled us even closer together. He was already panting, the soft breaths right up against my ear and making it hard to focus on anything.

"G-Grimm…" His voice was hoarse, barely audible over everything else. "Want you…"

The words weren't surprising, and I couldn't help but nod in agreement. We both needed this, probably more than anything else at the moment. But I wasn't about to have sex in the fucking bathtub, so I grabbed onto Ichigo the best I could and stood. Thankfully he had enough common sense to wrap his legs around my waist as I stepped out of the tub and moved into the bedroom. I pried his arms off and dropped him on the bed before I moved to the dresser and quickly grabbed a bottle of lube. If I was correct in assuming that Ichi was indeed a virgin, he'd need it.

The look he gave me when I crawled onto the bed was damn near priceless. "We're using… Lube…?"

He looked so lost and confused I couldn't help but laugh, uncapping the tube and pouring and overly-generous amount into my hand. "Of course, dumbfuck. Ya wanna tear?"

His eyes widened, if only a little bit, and he shook his head. I couldn't keep the smile off my face at his reaction – it was just too unreal. It faltered when Ichigo's expression took on a hint of fear, though. I sighed a bit and leaned down over him, my lips right next to his ear. "I'll be gentle; I promise."

The kid seemed to calm down a bit at that, only to tense up when I experimentally circled a finger around his hole, then pushed it in completely without warning. He whimpered and I kissed the side of his neck. "Relax, damnit."

He must've been glaring because the pathetic sounds stopped, and he rolled his hips. "Feels weird."

I couldn't help but scoff, adding a second and trying to get as far in as possible. "If you'd relax it wouldn't be as bad. Christ, I'd think you were a virgin or somethin', with how much you're complaining."

I knew right off the bat I'd struck a chord when Ichigo didn't have some smartass comeback waiting. In other words, I was right. But it meant I'd have to be more careful; virgins broke so easily.

Ichigo whined again when the third was added, but then silenced himself a few moments later – probably not wanting to be embarrassed. His hips wouldn't stay still, which I took to be a good sign, so I pulled my fingers out and lined myself up with him.

"Ready?"

I didn't know why I was asking, but Ichigo nodded. His hand came up and grabbed the back of my neck, pulling me down so our faces were level. Our lips met in a bruising kiss right as I pushed in, Ichigo's muffled cry echoing through the air. I felt his hands snake into my hair and  _pull_ , directing my head this way and that as his lips attacked mine.

As soon as I was balls-deep Ichigo started squirming around and whining. He broke the kiss, turning his head to the side and trying to catch his breath. It left his neck widely exposed, so I took up the opportunity to repay his earlier favour and leave a mark of my own, one that would most definitely bruise and then scar over. Ichigo yelped and I pulled back with a smirk. Damn kid deserved it, though I couldn't help but wonder if I'd gone too far.

The thought was gone the instant Ichigo's muscles tensed up, making me hiss. It was then that I started moving, pulling out almost completely before pushing back in with a low grunt. Ichigo yelped again, though as the thrusts picked up speed the sounds of discomfort were replaced with wanton moans and groans. His legs wrapped themselves around my waist, in turn just giving me a better angle to get in deeper.

"G-Grimm," Ichigo gasped, speaking in between breaths. "Touch me… Please-!" He broke off with a particularly loud moan, his hands fisting the sheets until his knuckled turned white. I couldn't help but comply, reaching down and grabbing his cock with a harsh tug. The kid seemed to like it, rolling his hips almost frantically and groaning like a bitch in heat.

"Ya like this?" I asked, not noticing how out-of-breath I was. The thrusts slowed in speed but, in turn, drove deeper, making it so that Ichigo's prostate was hit every single time. My hand matched the pace perfectly and within a few seconds Ichigo was practically singing. He made the most beautiful noises, something that I'd never admit for anybody else.

His voice jumped an octave when he was close, I assumed, hands scrambling around blindly and eventually ending up in my hair again. He pulled me down for another kiss, hitting his climax moments after our lips touched with a muffled cry. The end result was me doing the same, his hole practically milking me dry.

We pulled apart slowly, breaths mixing with each other and foreheads meeting. I doubted neither of us could speak, or even really wanted to. Ichigo practically went limp on the bed, a lazy smile tugging at his lips and a laugh getting pulled from his throat. It grew until it was bordering hysterics and for a second I thought I'd have to slap him. I pulled out and lay down next to him, thoroughly exhausted.

"Whasso funny?" My voice was slurred, and surprisingly sounded humorous.

Ichigo just shook his head and curled up next to my chest, the laughing dying off. "Nothing… Shiro's just mad you didn't use a condom."

I felt my eye twitch but still chuckled, moving to crawl under the blankets and pull Ichigo close. "Why the fuck should he care? 'S like he's your babysitter or somethin'."

He nodded, his hair tickling my nose. "Yeah… But he brought me to you, so I guess I can't complain…"

Ichigo's words confused me, and they were almost something I didn't want to hear. I almost asked him what he meant, but his breath had evened out, telling me he'd crashed. When I actually thought about it, he  _was_  pretty cute – almost like a kitten.

I fell asleep with the image of Kitten-Ichigo stuck in my head.

~*o~*~o~*~o~*~o~*~o*~

(Shiro POV)

I couldn't believe it.

Grimmjow actually fucked Ichigo. And  _liked_  it. The blue-haired Adonis never  _liked_  sex – not from what his reputation said. Grimmjow fucked for his own pleasure, never even giving a second thought to his partner's feelings. But with Ichigo… It was different. He cared about Ichi, or else he wouldn't have bothered with lube, or waiting until Ichi was comfortable, or even kissing back. This all just proved that I had seen and knew was right – that these two were made to be together.

The deal with Ichigo was drawing to a close, as much as I hated to admit. Ichigo had already accepted his feelings for Grimmjow.

Now it was time for the other to do the same, whether he liked it or not. If he didn't… Then both mine and Ichigo's lives could be at stake.


	12. I Can't Stand Breaking The Chains

(Ichigo POV)

To say that I was surprised to be waking up next to Grimmjow was an understatement. He had come off as so heartless lately that I would've expected him to shove me out of bed or something. What I  _was_  surprised to see was Pantera curled up on the pillow above Grimmjow's head. I could've sworn the door had been shut last night before we…

The memory hit me like a slap to the face.

Grimmjow and I had sex.

Holy  _shit_.

Shiro's sudden cackling laughter made me jump. Grimm mumbled in his sleep and threw one of his arms over me, then dragged me up against his chest and fell back into sleep with his nose in my hair. I couldn't help but smile and reach up to lightly grip Grimmjow's bicep.

' _ **Seems like 'e finally did it,'**_ Shiro said almost smugly. I rolled my eyes.

' _Did what? Fuck me?'_ I scoffed softly to myself, careful not to wake Grimmjow or Pantera with the sound.  _'It was bound to happen sooner or later, don'tcha think?'_

Shiro burst out laughing, making my head start to throb dully.  _ **'Tha' wouldn't a happend if I hadn' stepped in las' night. I ain't talkin' 'bout that.'**_ Shiro paused.  _ **'He**_ **marked** _ **ya, King, an' you, him.'**_

Marked? What the hell?  _'What're you talking about? Only animals do that, don't they?'_

He just started laughing again.  _ **'Not jus' animals, Ichi. 'S a sign of ownership. Any creature can do it, if they really wanna, an' if they feel strongly enough 'bout somebody to claim 'em.'**_

I blinked, confused. If I remembered correctly, when animals marked each other, others could tell immediately. But what about Grimmjow and I? I turned to look up at his face, only to have a sharp jolt of dull pain shoot through the side of my neck, making a soft hiss escape past my teeth. Shiro chuckled, a low, dark sound that was eerily creepy yet almost relaxing at the same time, if it were even possible.

' _ **Thass yer answer. Ya humans call 'em hickies or lovebites, but iss the same principle. Ya give 'em ta someone ya own – someone ya really care 'bout.'**_

So that meant Grimmjow really  _did_ care about me and not just the money. Though at one point he more than likely cared more about the money than me, or even his job protecting me. But this changed everything. Maybe he finally accepted his feelings, or maybe he was just being a stubborn jackass and was just going to keep denying it. I frowned as a sudden thought flashed through my head, one that should have occurred earlier.

' _Does that mean Grimm thinks he_ owns _me?'_

I couldn't help but feel a little pissed. I didn't want to belong to him, let alone anybody else. Sure, I might've had feelings for him, but the blue-haired bastard did _not_  own me – nobody did, whether I loved them or not. Well,  _maybe_  if I loved them. But still. Shiro laughed once again. I was going to have to do something about that, because it was really starting to make my head hurt.

' _ **It's a good thing, King. Means yer safe – nobody else'd be allowed ta touch ya. An' if they did, there'd be hell ta pay if and when Grimmy found out.'**_

I failed to see how this was a good thing, even with Shiro's explanation, but I figured it'd be better to just let it slide. No point in arguing over something that he was more than likely right about – I'd just be practically begging to loose. Shiro confirmed it with a quick sound of approval and then disappeared back into my mind. He'd been doing that an awful lot lately, but I just pushed it aside just like I did with Grimmjow's arm currently holding me firm against his bare chest. I needed a shower, finding the feel of dried cum sticking to my skin completely disgusting. But when I stood, a sharp pain erupted in my lower back and my legs gave out, sending me to the floor with a loud yelp.

Which, in turn, woke Grimmjow up.

Fuck.

"Ichi?" I saw his head peek over the edge of the bed, his baby blue hair a giant mess and eyes still full of sleep. "What're ya doing down there? I didn't push ya off, did I?"

I was a little shocked at how much he cared, believing Shiro's words a bit more. "No. I wanted to take a shower but I couldn't even make it a step away from the bed." I sounded and felt like a child, especially when Grimmjow started laughing tiredly. His head disappeared and I heard the blankets rustling before he came around to the side of the bed I was on, picking me up.

"No surprise there. I fucked ya pretty hard last night." I blushed at the sentence and Grimmjow chuckled. He carried me into the bathroom and set me down on the counter, then started running the bathtub, which was – for some reason – empty and clean. I didn't remember it draining last night. Then again, I passed out pretty early, so Grimm must've gotten up sometime and drained it. Maybe during a late-night piss. I didn't really care enough to ask about it.

Either way, it was full of steaming water within ten minutes and he was helping me into it.

"I'm gonna go make some breakfast, okay?" He whistled and Pantera walked into the bathroom, tail held high. She jumped up onto the rim of the tub and meowed at me. "She'll come and get me when you're done, if you need help. Though if you aren't out by the time breakfast is done I'm eating it all and you can go hungry until lunchtime."

I rolled my eyes and nodded, then brought my hand out of the water to scratch the feline's head, making her start purring. I felt Grimmjow press a kiss to my forehead before I saw his stark-naked ass disappearing out the door.

~*~o~*~o~*~o~*~

(Grimmjow POV)

Once I left Ichigo in the bathroom I pulled on a pair of sweats and made my way out into the kitchen to start fixing breakfast. My stomach grumbled at the thought of food, making me realize that neither of us had anything to eat since early yesterday afternoon. And even then it was hardly anything at all. So I decided that a big breakfast was called for.

I'd just heated up the griddle and pulled out bacon, eggs, and hash browns when my phone started ringing. I would've normally just left it – if it were important enough they could leave a fucking message. But the ringtone was incredibly specific, and annoying as all hell. Kisuke was calling, and it was hardly ever something to be ignored. Even all of the times he had me doing stupid shit, there was always a bigger meaning behind it. So I strode into the living room to find the irritating device, which had somehow fallen in between the cushions on the couch. I pulled it out and answered the call.

"The fuck do ya want, Urahara?"

From the other end of the line came an obviously-fake offended breath.  _"Now now, Grimmy-kun. That's no way to greet your darling boss~ You should be more caring towards meeeeee."_

I scoffed and walked back into the kitchen to start laying strips of bacon onto the griddle. "And why the hell should I do that?"

" _Becauuuuse, I developed a method to pull Shiro out of Ichigo's mindscape."_ It wasn't too difficult to make out the bragging tones in Urahara's voice, meaning he must have been especially proud of this little experiment. But there was always a catch.

"How dangerous is it?"

Urahara sighed a bit and I could clearly picture him running his hand through his hair, in turn making his hat fall off – something he had a habit of doing when he was nervous or unsure of something.  _"I really don't know, to be honest. The list is infinitesimal. Anything could happen. It could go horribly wrong or fantastically right; maybe even both. I wouldn't know until we tried."_ He paused, probably waiting for me to say something. I didn't.  _"… Do you think Ichigo would want to try?"_

I stiffened slightly at the question.  _Would_  Ichi wanna try it? I seriously hoped not – not if it meant possibly risking his life. "I dunno. What exactly'd happen if Ichi were ta do it? What'd happen ta Shiro?"

" _I made a sort of fake body for Shiro,"_ Kisuke explained, his voice taking on a serious tone.  _"I believe that I can transfer Shiro's soul into this body without harming Ichigo._ Hopefully _. I'm not promising anything, because I haven't found a way to test it. But it should be safe, if I've done my calculations correctly."_

I took a moment to think, flipping the bacon and pressing on the slices with the back of the spatula to get rid of some excess grease. Ichigo could get seriously hurt, but at the same time it could also free him from Shrio. I didn't really want him to do it, but it wasn't my choice. "I dunno, Kisuke. I'll ask Ichigo about it when he gets done with his bath, then I'll either call your or be over there." I didn't bother with a goodbye, hanging up and refraining from throwing the phone at the wall.

I didn't want Ichigo to get hurt, and I couldn't even say why for sure. Maybe it had to do with the fact that I was starting to develop feelings for him, though I'd never in a million years tell  _him_  that. Maybe it was because I'd miss his company if something seriously bad happened. I'd grown accustomed to his presence the past few days, and I had to admit, having Ichigo around was a thousand times better than living alone with Pantera. And there was the fact that we'd had sex last night, which  _must_  have meant something, especially since it was  _in my fucking bed_.

So many things that I didn't know about. They all confused the living fuck outta me. I didn't like it one bit. Maybe I  _did_  love Ichigo. And maybe it was just some fling that'd be over and forgotten in a few days. I couldn't tell for sure which was the truth; everything was so jumbled up.

I finished up with the bacon and started on the hash browns and eggs, deciding internally that if I loved Ichigo, then I had better come out and say it before something bad happens.

"It's burning."

I jumped at Ichigo's voice, finding him half hiding behind the corner with still-wet hair, then looked back down at the food in front of me. Sure enough, there were bits of black starting to appear, so I scooped them up onto a plate and set it down on the counter. Ichigo walked forward, wearing one of my button-up shirts that was way too big on him, then gave me a hug accompanied with a loud yawn. I couldn't help but smile and hug him back, planting a kiss on top of his head.

If I hurt this kid, then Karma was gonna fucking kick me in the balls later, and I would gladly welcome it for not being able to do my job and protect him. Either that or Shiro would beat Karma to it and do it himself. Either way, I couldn't fail - not now. Ichigo was becoming increasingly more and more important to me, and the vision of living without him was taking a turn towards 'painful and miserable.'

My grip on Ichigo tightened at the thought of not having him around, though I hope he didn't notice too much. I had to protect Ichi, and that was that.


	13. It's Not That Easy For Me To Say Goodbye

(Ichigo POV)

"You're hiding something from me, aren't you?"

Grimmjow looked up at me with a mouth full of bacon and eggs, arching a thin blue eyebrow in my direction. Pantera meowed at me and I broke off a piece of the meat and fed it to her. Grimm had been eerily quiet while we were eating, and it wasn't because he was shoving food into his mouth like some kind of starved animal. No, something felt off about him – kind of like when somebody is keeping a secret and they can't let anybody else find out, so they act all quiet and reserved, then outright deny any accusations as to keeping a secret in the first place.

_Exactly_  what Grimmjow was doing.

He looked away from me, another sign that something was on his mind. "No I'm not. The fuck gives you that idea?" He shoveled another forkful of food into his mouth and I resisted the urge to slam my forehead down onto the table.

"Yes you are, Grimm," I said sternly, threading my fingers through my still-damp hair. "Blatantly avoiding conversation? Not even  _looking_  at me? Something's up with you, and I wanna know what." In the back of my mind Shiro gave me an approving laugh, his own way of saying he liked what I did. He always encouraged that I not take shit from anybody – Grimmjow included.

Grimmjow himself set his fork down on his plate and ran a hand through his messy hair, looking like he was preparing himself for something. "Kisuke called earlier while you were in the bath… Said he'd found a way to get Shiro out of you."

At the words a rush of sudden fear washed over me, making me involuntarily stiffen. It must've been Shiro's doing, because I honestly thought that the idea wasn't half bad. It sounded reasonable. I had no idea why Shiro was so scared. When I asked he didn't say anything – just slunk back into the recesses of my mind. I shook it off and redirected my attention back to Grimmjow.

"Really? That's great, I guess." I didn't sound too enthusiastic, but it should've been at least a little reasonable. I'd lived with Shiro's presence for months now; it gave me a sense of security, knowing that he could get me out of most any kind of trouble I got myself into. But now I had Grimmjow, and he could do the same thing. The only difference was that he wasn't a demon and didn't live in my head. Grimmjow couldn't be there all the time either, and I didn't want to take his life away from him any more than I already had.

He didn't even seem to notice anything was off with my response, just nodding and continuing to eat. "We'll go see Urahara after breakfast," he mumbled after swallowing. I only nodded along and poked at my food, suddenly not hungry. Pantera came over and started eating off my plate and I gladly let her – better to not let food go to waste.

After we – Grimmjow – finished eating we left, walking to Kisuke's shop. It wasn't very far and took no more than ten minutes to get there on foot. All the while I could feel Shiro's panic start to increase, making me jumpier than I would have liked. He still wouldn't tell me what was wrong, so I eventually just gave up asking. By the time we got to the shop I felt like curling up in a corner and crying, just from how scared Shiro's emotions were making me. I almost had trouble figuring out which emotions were mine and which were Shiro's. It helped when Grimmjow put an arm around my shoulder, making the fear edge off a little.

Kisuke led us back to the lab portion of his shop and there we discovered a sort of mannequin laying on a table, only it looked like a real person – a mirror image of myself, in fact. Snow-white hair that was a little longer than my own, pale skin, long-ish black fingernails, a lithe muscled figure covered in a simple grey pair of boring scrubs. It definitely looked like a Shiro, and through the demon's fear I caught a glimpse of admiration.

"What do you think, Ichigo?" Urahara asked, the sudden sound of his voice interrupting the silence making me jump. Damn Shiro, making me feel so on-edge.

"What do  _I_ think or what does  _Shiro_ think?"

"Both."

"Well…" I took in a deep, shaking breath, trying to calm myself down. It didn't work. "I like it. So does Shiro, I think. It's hard to get his opinion at the moment. It's like… He's scared of something. He won't tell me why or what though."

It was quiet for a minute before Kisuke took in a deep breath and nodded. "Well… Let's get started, then."

The second the shopkeeper walked out of the room I nearly lost it – whether it was from my own nervousness or Shiro's, I didn't know, nor did I even care. I turned to Grimmjow and buried my face in his chest, trying to keep myself from crying like a little baby. Despite my attempts my cheeks grew wet, as did the front of Grimm's shirt. I clung to him like he was the only thing that mattered, and at that point I was pretty sure it was the truth.

"Grimm, I don't wanna do it," I mumbled into his chest, gripping the fabric of his shirt so hard my hands started to hurt. I felt one of his own hands move into my hair, the other curling around my waist. It was comforting, but it wasn't enough to make me calm down. "Don't make me do it…"

"Why not?" he asked, voice surprisingly soft and calm, unlike the rough and commanding tone it usually held.

I just gripped his shirt harder, surprised that my fingernails weren't tearing holes in the fabric. "I just… This feels wrong… So wrong…" I lifted my head and looked up at Grimmjow, his face looking a little distorted from the stupid tears that kept running down my cheeks. "Something bad  _always_  happens when people try to break a contract between a demon and a human."

Grimmjow shook his head and I could see a faint smile tugging at his lips. "That won't happen this time."

I frowned. "Why not? I'm no different than anybody else who made a contract, and neither is Shiro. This is gonna turn out just as badly as every other time and I don't want—" Soft lips against my own cut off my rambling, thin pieces of hair tickling my cheeks and forehead. The kiss was broken a second later, Grimmjow pulling back and moving the hair out of my eyes. There was a warm smile on his face, but his expression made him looked pained.

"Because I love you," he muttered, pressing our foreheads together. "And I won't let anything bad happen to you."

If I wasn't crying before I was crying then, Grimmjow's words just making me not want to do it even more. I didn't want anything to happen, especially since I'd just heard what I had been wanting to hear ever since I started developing feelings for the big brute. He pulled me close to his chest and kept kissing the top of my head, gently rocking us side to side. It was almost comforting, but that still didn't change the fact that I still  _didn't want to do it._

' _ **Issok, Ichi,'**_ Shiro said softly, his voice echoing around in my head and feeling like a gentle soothing touch, instead of the harsh prodding it usually was.  _ **'Juss go ahead with it. It'll be alright, 'kay? Nothin' ta be scared 'bout. I promised nothin'd hurt ya, didn' I?'**_

I couldn't help but nod, not caring if Grimmjow knew why I was or not. It was then that Kisuke walked back into the room. Not even his freakish stripy hat couldn't hide the nervous look on his face. But Shiro said that it would be alright, and he had never once lied to me – he'd always been right about everything he said. I leaned up and kissed Grimmjow one more time before walking over and standing next to Kisuke. When he told me to put my hand on the fake body's chest, I complied, his voice sounding a little funky and far away.

' _I hope you're right about this, Shiro,'_ I thought at the last minute, gripping the edge of the cold metal table with my free hand, letting my head hang and my eyes slide shut.

Shiro chuckled, and for once the sound was more comforting than menacing.  _ **''Course I'm right. When 'ave I ever lied ta ya?'**_ He laughed to himself, then went quiet. In the background, I heard Kisuke flicking some switches and everything went dark, even with my eyes closed. My hand on the body's chest started tingling, like it'd fallen asleep. The feeling started working up my arm, then across my shoulders and down to my feet. I didn't like it.

Shiro sighed softly, his consciousness brushing up against my own and leaving a warm, loving feeling rushing through my body underneath all of the irritating tingles.  _ **'I gotta go, King. Take care of yerself, 'kay? An' make sure ta keep that Adonis in 'is place.'**_ He chuckled at his own comment, his voice starting to sound as far off and distant as Kisuke's was.  _ **'See ya later, Ichigo.'**_

The last thing I heard was somebody yelling my name and a high-pitched screeching that made my head start throbbing. Then everything suddenly went deadly quiet. The pain was gone as easily as it had occurred. I couldn't feel anything – not even my heart beating in my chest. There was a bright, blinding light, and then there was nothing.


	14. The Only Thing I Would Die Without

(Grimmjow POV)

It was supposed to be safe. Nothing was supposed to happen; I  _promised_  Ichigo nothing would happen. I  _promised_  him that everything would be okay.

I  _never_  broke my promises.

Except for this one time – the  _one time_  it mattered most.

I started getting nervous when Ichigo hung his head over the mannequin body. It got worse when he started shaking, then bordered hysterics when he collapsed with a loud, dull  _thud_. I couldn't stop myself from running forward to him, and Kisuke didn't move from his spot. I pulled Ichigo up into my arms, his head lolling around limply. His skin was cold to the touch, but he was still breathing, albeit a bit shallowly.

The good thing, Ichigo was alive. The bad thing, he looked and felt like death and I had no idea what was wrong, or how to fix it.

I looked up at Urahara, glaring. "You said everything would be fine!"

He raised his hands in defense, walking over slowly and taking off his hat. "I said that anything could happen." He stopped and started prodding around at the fake body in the table, eyebrows knitting together in a deep frown. "There isn't even anything  _in_  this body…"

I stood up as fast as I could, almost falling over, pulling Ichigo up with me and holding him close. "You mean this was all for fucking nothing?" If I wasn't holding Ichi, Urahara would've had a broken nose. "God knows what's happened to him because of this! He didn't even wanna do it in the first place!"

The shopkeeper looked up at me and glared. He was usually a calm guy, even when angered. I'd never seen him glare at anything or anyone. "Then you shouldn't have made him."

Instead of saying something that I would have regretted, I walked out of the room with Ichigo and moved into the sitting room, taking up a spot on a cushion and letting Ichi lay out beside me with his head on my leg. There was some colour staring to come back to his cheeks, but not enough to make a huge difference. The rest of his skin was still almost sickly pale. It wasn't even a healthy pale – at least then there'd at least be  _some_  pink to his complexion. If that were the case, which it wasn't.

There wasn't much I could do, so I just resorted to combing my fingers through his hair – still soft and clean from the bath earlier that morning. It scared me as to how calmly I was reacting to all of this, and how still Ichigo was. His breathing was so shallow his chest was barely moving. What in the hell could have happened to have this as a result? This  _shouldn't_ have happened. But it did, and I just had to keep reminding myself of that fact.

What's done is done, as Ulquiorra would say. Damn robotic bastard. If things just kept getting worse, I might just end up having to call him out for a drink or six. He was the only one that could handle me when I was shitfaced – Nnoitora refuses after I almost broke his neck for reasons I don't even remember anymore.

I nearly jumped when Ichigo shot straight up, gasping for air like he'd been about to drown, brown eyes wide and scared. I was about to reach forward and grab his shoulder when he turned, looked at me, and stiffened, slowly starting to move to the other side of the room. I frowned.

"Ichi? You alright?" I didn't move, instead putting on the best 'worried' face I could muster. Poor kid was probably catatonic, though it was a mystery as to how that would even happen in the first place.

He didn't answer, instead just stood on shaking legs and backed up against the far wall. "Kisuke!" he called, and only a few seconds later did Urahara walk in, a look of relief on his face.

"Ichigo, you're alright!" He shot forward and hid Ichigo in a big hug, releasing him a few seconds later. His eyes were still stuck staring directly at me. The shopkeeper seemed to notice and immediately frowned, looking confused. "Ichigo, why are you staring at Grimmjow? I thought you two would be eating each other's faces off by now."

Ichigo looked appalled. "What? I don't even know this guy! Why would I be making out with him?"

People say that when something heartbreaking happens, it feels like their hearts drop into their stomachs. I perfectly understood what they meant at that very moment.

Ichigo didn't remember me.

Urahara muttered something that sounded like "shit" and Ichigo just continued to stare at me. Particularly my hair. My eye twitched but I didn't say anything. I hated it when people stared at my hair, and an amnesic Ichigo was no different. So I just looked away, pretending not to notice anything. There were no doubts in my mind that I looked downright pissed. Or incredibly upset. I didn't think there was a difference between the two when it came to my facial expressions.

Out of my periphery, I saw Ichigo sit on the opposite end and across the table from myself, still staring at me like I was some kind of alien. Kisuke sighed and took a seat next to him. It was awkwardly silent for the next few minutes. The tension in the air was so thick it could've probably been cut clean through with a knife. It was Hat-n-Clogs that broke the silence.

"Ichigo… Are you  _sure_  you've never met Grimmjow before?"

The kid nodded, brown eyes narrowing. "Absolutely sure. I think I'd remember meeting somebody with freakishly blue hair."

It took everything I had not to slam my hands down on the table and storm out of the room. Thankfully Urahara stood up for me, something I'd only openly appreciate when Hell froze over.

I wanted to leave – wanted to just go back home and drink myself stupid; until I couldn't even think straight. I didn't even have the slightest clue as to  _how_  I'd fallen for the orange-haired brat this quickly, and this hard. It shouldn't have happened, nor should it have even been  _possible_. I'd only know the kid a week, tops. That shouldn't have been long enough for any sort of major relationship to form.

Karma – or Fate or whatever – is a bitch, I guess.

"Ichigo."

Kisuke's voice made me snap out of my thoughts, the shopkeeper looking genuinely guilty.

"Do you want to still stay with Grimmjow, or would you rather stay with me?"

My breath caught in my throat, something I didn't expect to happen. I looked over to Ichigo and the expression on his face changed, gaze shifting to the tabletop and his eyebrows knitting together. I already knew the answer before he even said anything.

"I'd rather stay with you." He looked up rather suddenly, looking sympathetic. "I have no idea what you two are thinking, but don't  _know_  you; we've never even met before."

Kisuke opened his mouth to say something – presumably to try convincing Ichigo to come back home with me. I just shook my head and stood.

"'S fine," I grumbled, walking towards the doors and pausing with one open. "Ya know how ta reach me, Kisuke." The door slid shut behind me as I walked out of the store and down the street.

Somehow, I couldn't help but think that Shiro was at fault for this. It seemed like the most logical reason, after all. But whoever or whatever was at fault didn't really matter anymore. It's already done. Ichigo didn't remember me, and probably never would. I was back to the old ways – living alone with Pantera and just hoping for somebody to come through and break the stupid, boring routine of my life.


	15. Epilogue

(Shiro POV)

_Two months later…_

I was bound to get in trouble for this – for checking up on Ichigo and Grimmjow without proper permission. I'd been doing it for about a month and a half now, ever since I could get everything straightened out with the higher-ups.

It certainly wasn't easy, trying to convince them that the contract between Ichigo and myself had been fulfilled. Grimmjow had confessed his love, and that had been my goal. I knew that Ichigo loved Grimmy too, but he'd never said it. That, in turn, made the others think that I had failed. For that I wasn't allowed to leave their sight until they said I could. Luckily, I played the 'good boy' act and was released rather early, then becoming free to do whatever I wanted, except for make any kind of contact with Ichigo.

It was the law that said two previously contracted beings – once the contract had been either fulfilled or nullified – couldn't associate with one another ever again. The penalty for breaking this law was for the demon to be imprisoned until either his previous contractor was dead, or he was – whichever came first.

Despite knowing this, I needed to see Ichigo. I'd unintentionally taken something from him when I'd left – all of his memories that had anything to do with myself. That means everything I did to him, everything that I caused to happen, Ichigo didn't remember.

He didn't know that he had a criminal record.

He didn't know that he'd ever met Grimmjow.

He didn't know who I was.

It was like the past seven months of his life had never even happened. And I felt horrible about it. Watching Ichigo now, it was almost painful. He had decided to stay with Kisuke instead of going back with Grimmjow, and ever since then he'd been acting a little… Odd. He spaced out a lot, had night terrors frequently, and sometimes wouldn't eat or drink anything. Kisuke had tried to help, but nothing worked. The shopkeeper had worn himself ragged, trying to find a way to bring Ichigo's memories back, only to fail at every attempt.

The only time I saw Grimmjow was when I visited his home, finding him either passed out in a drunken haze or absently petting his cat while staring at a blank TV screen. I'd followed him to a bar one time, where he'd met up with a pale man with black hair and green tear streaks tattooed onto his cheeks. The man didn't talk much, only watching as Grimmjow drunk himself stupid, then dragging him back home. Another time, I'd been unlucky enough to see Grimmjow and the man in the middle of a round of what I assumed to be rage sex on the kitchen floor. I didn't stay very long before making my way back to Ichigo.

I was thankful that nobody could see me – that, to humans, I was no more than an oddly placed, slightly cool wisp of air dancing through the room. Ichigo was in too much of a daze to notice, Grimmjow was either sleeping or drunk or in the same daze as Ichigo, Kisuke was too frazzled and stressed, a heavy burden of guilt weighing down on his shoulders. Even the strange man was starting to be affected – long red scratches down his back, arms, and chest, dark circles under his eyes.

It was starting to show on all of them. If kept up, there wouldn't be anything left of them except for hollow empty shells after a while. Saving them seemed like something I needed to do, and fast.

The only problem was, I didn't know how.


End file.
